I used to have the ideal situation: class, sports, then spend the evening with the guy I was madly in love with. Repeat. As time passed we change and life changes. Everything gets crazy. Long term, long distance relationships are hard and mine was a prime example. Going from spending every waking moment together to just weekends when I was a freshman in college was hard. Then when he left for school two hours north of me, we were lucky to see each other every other weekend. I’m not saying the love ever left, but the distance took a toll on our communication and our connection. Although losing someone I cared so deeply about was extremely hard, it had to have been one of the best things to ever happen to me.
Truthfully, I thought my life was over. Come to find out, it had just started. The time that I used to spend putting energy into our relationship I was able to use to explore the world a little more. I traveled to new states, and different countries. Adventures became my new love and I enjoyed my time to myself, chasing sunsets, walking 10th Ave. in NYC, blasting music on my way to who-knows-where. Not only was I able to get out and explore, I was able to spend time with my girlfriends who I had abandoned for the longest time. Weekends became fun-filled, sleeping at school, wake up and enjoy brunch and catch up on the latest drama from the night before. I remember sitting there thinking, “I used to miss so much, this is awesome.” Being with my friends and actually having female friends who I was with all the time was so different and satisfying for me.
Well, a year had passed. I still was thinking of my ex daily. I went out a few nights and was becoming more curious of other boys, which was weird for me. I started getting the feels for this one. I decided, whatever, experiment, it doesn’t have to be forever. THIS IS TRUE. Just because you want to try to hang out with another guy, doesn’t mean you will marry him. Every person who enters your life is a lesson, good or bad.
Girls, remember: after a breakup, take time for yourself. Hopping right back in on another relationship doesn’t heal over the scars you currently have. Use as much time as you need and find who you are. Adventure, explore, experiment. Do whatever you need to do to become the best version of yourself.
(Photo by: Verne Ho, Burst)