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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Siena chapter.

Meeting in elementary school, spending every second together until high school. Thinking you would be in each others weddings, all the tiny moments in between. I never thought that my best friend of 12 years would ever stop being my best friend. Well life happens. People make choices. Life goes on. Breaking up with your best friend is like breaking up with your significant other, it actually may be worse. Here are a couple stages I went through that might be able to help you.

Denial

I could not wrap my head around the fact we weren’t friends anymore. Anytime I thought of anything remotely funny, I’d start to text her, I soon realized I wouldn’t be able to do that anymore. I would think about all our old memories, which made things worse. I told myself this was just a phase and next week we would be besties again. I was wrong.

Shit Talking/Anger

Everyone does it. Don’t feel bad if you have done this before. It feels good to let all the little things that you didn’t like about them out. Talking to others who did not like your best friend may be helpful. Get it all out. Then comes the anger, why do they not want to be friends anymore? What is wrong with me? Then you just have to think of all the things that hurt you and realize this is for the best.

Sadness

Once you get everything out, all you can think about is how you want to hang out with them. You want to apologize for things you didn’t even do, just to have your best friend back. You want to text them, you get sad when you drive by their house. The snapchat memories definitely don’t help. Seeing all the old videos or pictures for sure does not help.

Moving On

Realizing that the 12 years is actually over. Throwing away everything they got you, all the pictures you have on your wall are being taken down. You think of them less and realize this was a good thing. They were the weight bringing you down, and now there’s room to grow and be a better person. Slowly finding happiness on your own and being content with yourself.

Finding Your New Bestie

Everyone has to go through these stages, they might be in a different order but it will be pretty similar. Just know there’s hope after a bestie breakup and it just takes time. Not having someone in your life that you have had for the past 12 years is hard. That person becomes your sister, family, your world. Having that taken from you sucks, but only good comes out of it. Finding your new bestie will be the sidekick you never knew you needed!

Hope these steps help you if you’re going through a bestie breakup!

Alexandra Gazdik is a Siena College Class of 2022 alumna. During her time at Siena, she studied Marketing with a Concentration in Digital Marketing and Marketing Communications.