Hot Take: we spend too much time focused on romantic love and not enough time on self-love.
So, let’s talk about self-love.
In my twenty years of life, I have barely ever talked about self-love. Of course, I love myself, but do I really? Now, that was my attempt at a joke, but with every joke there is some truth. I can say I love myself as much as I want, but that does not mean I feel that way. Therefore, recently I have been exploring what self-love means. So, without further ado. Welcome to my exploration of self-love!
To begin, we need to know what self-love entails. How self-love manifests itself differ from person to person, but in short, Jeffery Borenstein says it is appreciation for yourself that grows from your actions. Additionally, self-love can look like any of these notions:
-
Talking positively about yourself
-
Putting yourself first
-
Limiting self judgement
-
Trusting yourself
-
Setting boundaries
-
Forgiving yourself for past actions
-
Taking care of your health
Honestly, self-love is a big task and is a lot of work. There is a heavy emphasis on focusing on what you need and not what you want, which can be troublesome. Yet, if you want to think about it, lots of people are so willing to give time, energy, and love to others and not themselves. For me personally, I give too much attention to men in engineering. If I focused that attention onto myself it would probably solve a lot of my problems. So, with that being said, I spent a day focused on me and here is how it went.
My journey with self-love has been weird and I wanted to spend a day where I could spend all my time focused on myself. Last week I took myself out on my ideal date, going Downtown Vancouver and treating myself to whatever I wanted. Additionally, I turned off all my phone notifications so I wouldn’t get occupied by other things. After my day, I cannot recommend spending time alone enough. I have always been shy and thought it would be awkward to do things by myself but isn’t at all! I had one of the nicest days since pre-quarantine just by myself doing what I wanted, on my own agenda. Being alone is so freeing, but obviously, if you go do something by yourself, please let someone what you’re doing as a safety precaution. I believe it is so important to be okay with being alone and I’m honestly excited to spend more time alone by myself (who would’ve thought!).
If you are looking for a sign to ditch all the toxicity in your life, this is it! This is the perfect time to focus and to learn how to truly love yourself. Whether that means spending time by yourself or having a healthy meal plan. It is all up to you! Good luck out there learning how to love your true self.