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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SFA chapter.

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            Okay so let’s take a minute to be honest here, as wonderful as people claim that sex is, sometimes it can just be downright awful. You can call it what you want: sex, making love, the horizontal tango, or as the old timers like to say, the coitus. But at the end of the day, sometimes it just ain’t right.

Now don’t get me wrong sis, I’d love to get all personal, but this is not a how-to article. As interesting as that would be, the point of this particular article is to share a bit of insight with you when it comes to your own personal love life.

The biggest thing that I think that everyone needs to throw out the window is the idea that sex with your partner is going to spot on and perfect every time. Because it won’t be! Your partner (as awesome as they may be) can’t be that great 24/7, but if they are then I’ll shut up and leave you to that glorious-ness. However, a lot of factors play a role in why sometimes “sexy time” isn’t the “best time”. Bodily things such as physical exhaustion, lack of proper nutrition, lack of sleep, and even stress are mood killers. Can’t rev an engine if there’s no gas in it, know what I mean? But not only that, one more thing is a big mood killer. It plays a big role in relationships as is but gets the least amount of recognition. Ready for it? Lack of C-O-M-M-U-N-I-C-A-T-I-O-N. That’s right I said it, the infamous ‘C’ word. We forever believe that our partners can perceive everything that we want from them. We want them to read our minds and give us exactly what we want, when and how we want it. But ladies that’s just not the case here. Unless they have some cool X-Men abilities, our partners just aren’t going to know what all we want at every possible given moment. I know it can be a bit difficult when it comes to opening your mouth and saying what it is you want or how you want it, but you’ll have to. Sis, if you want your partner to kiss you a certain way or touch you a certain way, to carry you cradle style to the bedroom and kick down the door then sweetie say it! No harm can be done if you do. At the very best, you’ll have mind-blowing sex. But if you continue to keep your needs and wants to yourself then that “good good” will be “bad bad” and will always be downright awful. If you have a problem with the way sexy time goes down, or don’t like the way your partner goes down, then you have to use that voice and speak up. Be confident in yourself now, in order to thank yourself later!

I'm a senior at Stephen F. Austin State University, currently majoring in Multidisciplinary Studies with the drive to one day become a novelist and a nurse.
Brianna is a Psychology major with a minor in Human Development and Family Studies here at SFA. She is passionate about people and that's how she landed a spot as CC for Her Campus' chapter at SFA! She enjoys hanging out with her cats, getting tattoos, and doing research. Her passion is to help the LGBTQ+ community by focusing on LGBTQ+ health and therapy in the future.