Dating is hard as it is but dating as you get older only gets harder. Fortunately, there are small ways that can make it so much easier. Here are five tips for playing the field.
Take what they say with a grain of salt
In my years of dating experience, this tip is what has kept me sane. When it comes to playing the field, you learn quickly that men say anything to interest you–literally anything. Common phrases to watch out for are as follows: “You’re different than other girls,” “I’m not looking for a relationship right now,” “I’m not talking to anyone else,” etc. I’m not saying these words are never genuine, the right one for you will definitely mean those things, but the guy you just met last week most likely is just playing the game. The issue is when they convince you to believe them right before they show their true colors, so to avoid heart break, just nod and smile. Pay attention to their words and see if there is a pattern, because there usually always is. For instance, if you’re dating while celibate, the very first thing they will say is that they do not mind it. Immediately getting excited is not recommended, because they need to show it rather than saying it, and that’s the point. Don’t take every sweet thing they say too seriously, unless they prove it to you and don’t be naïve.
Avoid fantasizing about the future
This is especially hard to do for all the hopeless romantics out there. How many times have we met a nice guy, gone on a few dates with him, and already imagining how the wedding will be like? Yes, it’s so fun and makes us feel good, but if it goes south then we’re left being an emotional mess. Keep in mind, this is when you and your person are not officially in a relationship. Ever since I stopped having those expectations, I’ve been having more fun!
Know what you want in a partner
Life is so much easier when you know exactly who and what you want. If you’re not sure, you can make a list of what qualities you find attractive and essential in a partner. Do you like tall or short? Rugged or soft? Do they have to be funny? Religious? Once you sort that out, you already know the type of person you want to date, and your process of elimination will be quick and easy. Knowing your type can save you more time than you know.
Steer clear of their circle afterwards
Let’s say you ghosted someone you went on a date with, and now you find their friend attractive, should you date their friend? To keep this short and sweet, you can do whatever you want to do at the end of the day, but it’ll be less awkward if you don’t. The main annoyance is when their friends like you two together, because now every time they see you, they’ll ask you about him. This tip is arguable, but from experience, it’s very annoying and can easily be avoided.