So you meet your best friend in college. You guys are roommates from freshman year to sophomore year…or maybe you guys practically live together because you’re always together.
You go out on best friend dates— you go to the movies and watch chick flicks because one of you hates scary movies. You try new restaurants, and if the food tastes bad you confiscate the experience by ordering large margaritas. You go grocery shopping together and split the bill in half to cook a combined dinner. You go to the library after you’ve studied for real because you know that you won’t get much work done any other way.
This is your person. The Monica to your Rachel. The Blair to your Serena. The Taylor Swift to anyone except Kim, Kanye and Katy. Side note: all of their names begin with the same letter. Coincidence? I think not.
The point is that getting through college with your best friend is therapeutic, and it’s sometime even one’s survival method. So what happens when your “best good friend” graduates a semester or even a year before you?
First things first, you have to cry. Do the ugly cry. Be dramatic. You’re allowed to cause an entire scene; best friends reserve the right to do a whole thing.
After you’ve completely destroyed your makeup with mascara running down your face, it is time to hop out of your self-pity party.
Be happy for your friend.
I know this may sound redundant because this is your best friend so why wouldn’t you support them? But the thing is, in some cases friends take separation really difficultly and intensely. Separation anxiety is a real thing! Thus, you have to remind yourself that college does not last forever and the goal is to get a degree.
Support is essential.
Go to their events. Be front and center when they get their class ring. Take behind the scenes photos when it’s time for grad pictures. When you support your friend it makes the process easier, because you’re going on the journey with them, as opposed to being an audience member, and not taking in the moment just as much they are. Even though it’s not quite yet your moment, it’s crucial to be a part of theirs to make sure they get all of the attention and have all of the time to shine.
Also, ask them if they need help with anything. Help them pack up their belongings. That’ll end up taking twice the time because so many different items will spark nostalgia, and the reminiscing conversations can last hours. Those are the moments that really count.
It’s good to be aware that your friend is nervous about leaving you just as much as you’re sad about them going. People normally don’t like change, but change is inevitable and it’s what’s necessary to grow.
The good news is that the technological advances we enjoy today permit the best resources for communication so a duo like you guys will never have to miss a beat. Facetime and video chats on laptops are right there for you. There’s also this little thing called social media. But that’s no big deal.
Here comes the cliché: “Distance makes the heart grow fonder.” Just because time moves on, some things never change. College does not last forever. A true friendship does.