Everything I do

Every move I make

It’s no use

And I try so hard

And I smile

But it’s not working.

And I don’t want to cry anymore.

It won’t let me breathe

And it won’t let me see

I can’t move

These sheets swallow me.

It says to me

You have no purpose

They would be better without you

You should give up

You don’t belong here

You will never smile again

And so I turn off the lights

And I fill the bathtub

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The voice gives its last words

“Do it”

And I step into my water.



And I write down every word the voice has ever said to me

And I place them in the water

And watch the ink smear and fade away

And I say


I want to move

I want to laugh

I want to dance

And so I will.

I will fight

And I won’t listen to you anymore

I will create my own voice

She will say to me

You have a purpose

They are better with you

You should never give up

You are exactly where you belong

And you will smile

And it will be real this time.