Last weekend, date night boiled down to a choice between the sequel of the Halloween series or A Star is Born— but when does Lady Gaga NOT win out? We set the horror film aside for the night and let Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper tug at our heartstrings for a few hours. Whether or not you’re a hopeless romantic or take part in “cuffing season”– this movie gave us a story to reflect on as we look at romantic relationships in Hollywood, specifically between Ally and Jackson Maine. Here’s the trailer for those of you who may want to watch.
The start of their relationship is intense for the wrong reasons. When Maine happens to stumble upon the drag bar where Ally performs, that was the moment that he “fell in love” at first sight. But if you ask me, it seems like he trespassed backstage and wouldn’t stop bothering Ally. At one point she is visibly uncomfortable–some may call it “starstruck”–but it is during a time that he is very insistent on helping her take her makeup off. Although this was meant to be humorous and maybe a little romantic, it also felt like this entire scene was normalizing masculine dominance. Maine’s character is visibly drunk and too persistent to the point where it felt a little creepy. She ends up going out for a drink with him, and that night “sparks” their romance.
As their relationship progresses, there are some cute moments– don’t get me wrong! However, some of the scenes are striking in the way that Maine uses his power and dominance to “help” Ally with her music career. It suggests a power difference while sticking to stereotypical gender roles. There is a scene where Ally is in the recording studio. She is struggling to perform the way she wants to. Then Jackson raises his voice at the recording producers and proceeds to tell her that she needs to have her piano with her or else she isn’t going to sound good. She ends up agreeing with him and doing exactly as he says. To me, this is a classic man-splaining scenario; the piano is something that made Ally good, but Jackson’s intervention is somewhat excessive and takes control of a situation that then makes her look like she had none. Ally’s demeanor throughout the beginning of the movie is rather submissive, and although she is learning her way into the music industry, it is mostly supervised by her boyfriend Jackson Maine.
The scenes that come afterwards carry very heavy topics, including alcohol and drug addiction and how they affect the nature of a relationship. After they marry Maine begins to verbally abuse Ally. By the end of the movie her character shows strength, even during the times when Maine flakes on his promises, or when he begins to blame her for his alcohol problem. In one scene, Ally wins a Grammy, and while she is giving her thank you speech Jackson Maine goes up on the stage, pees himself, and then passes out. She ends up being blamed for a lot of his issues. Absurd as it may seem, this happens to women very frequently: being blamed for the problems and issues of their significant others. In recent media, Ariana Grande has been highlighted for receiving blame for her ex-boyfriend’s drug problem, receiving a DUI, and totaling his car. She tweeted: “how absurd that you minimize female self-respect and self-worth by saying someone should stay in a toxic relationship… I am not a babysitter or a mother and no woman should feel that they need to be. I have cared for him and tried to support his sobriety & prayed for his balance for years (and always will of course) but shaming/blaming women for a man’s inability to keep his shit together is a very major problem. Let’s please stop doing that”.
I don’t want to spoil the ending, but Ally’s character grows immensely, and we see how her abusive relationship teaches her how to deal with the force of masculine energy. This love story shows traditional stereotypical gender roles and their toxicity, but it also highlights the difficulties that drug abuse has on relationships. If anything, Ally shows her strength in valuing the power of love in the face of toxic relationships.