Starting freshman year of college was one of the scariest but also exciting times of my life. Leaving home, new friends, new freedom, new version of you are all exciting, but if I’m being honest, it can also feel overwhelming, confusing, and nothing like what you imagined. Looking back, there are so many things I wish someone had told me about freshman year to help make the transition a little easier.
The number one thing I would say is that you don’t have to have it all figured out. As someone who loves to plan, I came here thinking I knew what the next 10 years of my life looked like. But all of my plans hit the fan and I felt so lost. It seemed like everyone around me knew exactly who they were and what they’re doing. But the truth is, they don’t. People are changing majors, switching friend groups, and questioning everything just quietly. It’s okay to feel unsure. That’s kind of the whole point. So, I wish I could come into college with the modest of whatever happens, happens because it would have saved me A LOT of stress.
Another one that I learned the hard way is not every friendship is meant to last. And that’s okay. You might meet people the first week and think, “these are my people forever.” Sometimes they are. Sometimes they’re not. And that doesn’t mean anything went wrong. College friendships can be seasonal, and each one still matters in its own way. Everyone is finding their crowds and still trying to figure out who they are as adults.
A crucial skill to leave is learning how to be alone without feeling lonely. There will be moments when you’re eating by yourself, walking to class alone, or staying in on a Friday night. That doesn’t mean you’re failing at life, but it means you’re human. Being comfortable alone is one of the most underrated skills you can develop. I used to be so dependent on being with my friends 24/7 to the point where it hurt my relationship with my friends. Then I learned to be okay with being alone and it turned into my favorite part of my day. Come back from class and just watch TV by yourself and decompress from your day.
If you’re walking around campus and everyone looks like they’ve got their whole life together, I can promise you that they don’t. They have just figured out balance. But balance is harder than it looks . Between classes, work, social life, and trying to take care of yourself, things can pile up fast. You don’t need to be perfect at balancing everything. One thing that has helped me a lot is having a planner and a calendar. I’ve been able to write out my days and what work needs to be done each day and that has helped me find balance in my weeks.
With my freshman year ending, I am not the same person I was when I came here. I’m also not the same person I was in high school either. And that’s okay. It’s okay to change throughout the year. Growth isn’t always obvious while it’s happening, but it’s there. You learn who you’re
meant to be friends with and who you’re not, whether your major is the best fit for you, and if college is even for you. Freshmen year isn’t about being perfect. It’s about learning, adjusting, and figuring things out as you go. Some days will feel amazing, others will feel messy, and most will fall somewhere in between. Just know you’re not behind, you’re not alone, and you’re doing better than you think. And if no one’s told you yet: it’s okay to take your time.