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SBU | Life

Nobody Cares!

Kirra Bentley Student Contributor, St. Bonaventure University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Within the last few years, at least in my opinion, there’s been an upsurge of embarrassment. Not because things have suddenly become more embarrassing to do, but because people seem more easily ashamed. Maybe it’s because I’m getting older and losing the carefree attitude I had as a kid, but it feels like you’re supposed to be embarrassed to stand out even a little in a crowd.

I’ll admit that I’m sometimes guilty of caring too much about what other people think. But I don’t think that’s my nature. If anything, I’m the opposite. I’m naturally outgoing, love being the center of attention, and spirited. Somewhere along the way, though, I think I’ve let myself be convinced that exhibiting these qualities in public is disconcerting and makes things awkward for everyone.

But that really isn’t the case.

I can’t remember the last time I saw someone being themselves or joking around with their friends, and thought they should quiet down or be embarrassed. In all honesty, I don’t want to be around people who are embarrassed by me anyway.

All of this is to say: don’t let embarrassment hold you back.

Just before spring break, I was asked to join an intramural soccer team. My immediate thought was hell no. I pictured myself completely missing a shot or tripping over the ball in front of everyone. I didn’t want my friends on the team to see that, let alone our opponents.

Still, I reluctantly agreed to join, realizing that letting hypotheticals stop me was kind of stupid.

At our first game, I was nervous, but once we started playing, I was actually having fun. Then, during the next game, my worst fear happened: I tripped in front of everyone. But no one laughed. In fact, someone from the other team even offered to help me up.

That moment made me realize something important. The worst assumption you can make is that people are mean. People aren’t rooting for you to fail. We’re all just trying to make memories and have fun while we can.

I’m not saying it’s wrong to have anxiety about standing out in public. For some people, that’s just natural. But if you’re someone who’s naturally a little louder than your friends, a little sillier, or whatever it may be, then be that.

To me, what’s more embarrassing than standing out is fitting in at the risk of not being yourself.

So join the intramural team. Talk to the person you like, even if they might not like you back. Laugh your own laugh, however loud it may be.

Nobody cares!

Kirra Bentley is a new member of St. Bonaventure University's chapter of Her Campus. She will be publishing articles weekly on topics such as popular culture, social advocacy, and more. She hopes to develop her writing skills by creating both light, fun pieces and deeper think pieces.

Kirra is currently a freshman at SBU, majoring in psychology. In addition to Her Campus, she is involved with the SBU Dance Team and Empower. She can often be found at the Rathskeller with her friends—winning at darts or eating boneless wings.

Outside of St. Bonaventure, Kirra is a Lego Batman–loving, Hunger Games–fanatic Swiftie. She loves the beach—specifically trips to Hull, Massachusetts—spending time with friends and family, and doing karaoke. Don't even get her started on the musical Hamilton...