Being part of a community is something a lot of people want. A support system, a group of friends, whatever you want to call it. Humans are social, and having someone in your corner is so important.
I think a lot of people have forgotten what being in a community entails.
Yes, it’s having friends. It’s getting dinner together, watching movies, having fun. Maybe it’s holidays at a shared table, or a club meeting filled with laughter (yes, Her Campus is a community!) But I think people forget that having a group isn’t always the fun bits.
About a week ago, I sat with my friend in the library for four hours. I didn’t have any homework I could work on, but I stayed the whole time. I made sure she didn’t go on her phone, offered to proofread, and she got everything done! That’s part of community.
Sitting in the library on a beautiful Sunday when I had a relaxing day planned, sweating like crazy, is one of the most important parts of maintaining a strong relationship. Would I have liked to be at home? Yes! But this friend is someone who has been there for years. We help each other, and she needed me there.
In about a month, I’ll be helping her move. Just like how I helped my sisters move, both into their dorms and their homes. I’ve gone grocery shopping with her, just to keep her company and make it more fun. And she has given me rides when I had car trouble and was one of my only friends to come to my grandmother’s funeral. It’s reciprocal.
Obviously, don’t let someone walk all over you. But dog sitting for a neighbor, or picking up drain cleaner for your aunt, or sharing cookies with someone you barely know are little things that yes, can be a little inconvenient, but that’s what builds relationships.
Before you know it, your neighbor is asking if you want to come over and play games. You might have to do a couple of chores for her, but your aunt will give you a cup of tea and you spend time catching up on the latest family drama. The person you shared cookies with might be the person that sits with you in the library for a long study session.
We expect the inconveniences that come from family. Family obligations are typical for most people, and normally they’re a group that you can rely on. Even if sometimes they drive you crazy.
It’s time we extend that same courtesy to people outside of our family units. Help each other clean or get through homework. Make someone a meal when you know they’re struggling. Just sit with them for a bit. It might be a little annoying, or not what you planned that night. But by easing the load off one person’s shoulders, the world gets a whole lot lighter.