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SBU | Wellness > Mental Health

Falling With the Leaves

Cecelia Mineo Student Contributor, St. Bonaventure University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

As the Halloween season comes to an end and late fall comes around, I look at the bare trees and can’t help but feel a little sad.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the beauty of fall. The colors of the trees changing, pumpkins on doorsteps, cornstalks and haybales, and hot apple cider. Even the smell of fall is comforting.

But I blink, and it’s all gone. Days are shorter, colder, and everything I see is covered in shades of gray.

When the beauty starts to fade, it’s really dulled, and it feels like someone sucked all of the color out of the sky. Mornings get later and later, the evening gets earlier and earlier (I mean, come on; darkness at 5 p.m. is an abomination in any sense).

It’s like this strange, grey purgatory that impacts my mood whether I notice or not. Seasonal depression sets in, and suddenly I’m a robot moving through my routines, practically with my eyes closed.

I wake up, go to class, do my homework, and try to convince myself I’m okay. But everything feels like I’m obligated to do so — classes, projects, clubs. Hell, even going out with my friends feels like a chore at one point.

I want to care, it even annoys me that I can’t, but I just can’t seem to find the fun in anything.

I’m not close to thriving; I’m barely even surviving.

I’m on autopilot.

But then the first snow falls, and it becomes a break in the storm. There’s no way to describe the peace that snow brings. It’s calming, soothing, grounding, and every other word all in one.

All of a sudden, there’s beauty again. When the snow covers that gross, gray muck, it’s a breath of fresh air. Suddenly, the world feels new all over. Everything feels clean, soft; it’s a fresh slate.

Still, I wish I didn’t lose those weeks of my life every year to dreariness. I wish I could cling to the last fleeting hopes of fall before they are lost, and I have to wait until winter. I wish I wouldn’t get so wrapped up in myself and was able to find the beauty in the dreariness.

Maybe, though, I need this cycle. Maybe I need it to remind to myself that the beauty and the good do come around again, and I will never be stuck in the dark. And perhaps that’s the beauty in seasonal depression.

It’s seasonal. It will always go away, and I’ll be stronger to fight it when the season comes back around. And, in 10, 20 seasons, it’ll suck a little less until it doesn’t suck at all.

Cecelia Mineo

SBU '27

Cecelia Mineo is brand new to the St. Bonaventure chapter of Her Campus! She is hoping to write about literally anything; music, travel, or school.
Cecelia is a junior at SBU, studying public health with a minor in business administration. She is Secretary of the Class of 2027 at SBU, three years running. Cecelia is also public relations of Health Science Club, a team leader at Enactus, an intern with the Bona Cabrini Program, and can be found always running around campus.
Outside of school, Cecelia loves reading, hiking, the beach, and hanging out with friends. If there is a Buffalo Bills game that day, she will always be watching or listening. She is obsessed with her puppy, Emmy, has probably listened to Treaty Oak Revival's entire discography ten times over and will always say yes to a concert trip.