I’m sure that almost all of us have been, and probably still are, on some sort of dating app. Whether it is Tinder, Bumble, Hinge or any other app, we’ve all had that temptation to see what they’re all about. Personally, I will admit that I have tried all three of these apps out and honestly could care less to even have them downloaded.
There are a few reasons why I feel this way and I am here to tell you why.
Algorithms & Accuracy
To start with, dating apps are not even accurate. You may being swiping and see the app advertise who “you’re most compatible with” and you swipe, but then you never end up matching that person. A lot of times when you swipe you may not get matched with someone because the algorithm that they use doesn’t really work. Yeah, you may have similar people to select from, but how can one app determine how a person feels? Just because you’re interested does not mean that the person on the other end is also interested.
Ghosting
Another reason why I am not a fan of dating apps is because of getting ghosted. For those who don’t know, getting “ghosted” is when someone all the suddenly cuts off communication with someone else without any warning or explanation. This does not sound very pleasant and I can tell you from my own experience that it is not. It actually can hurt a lot depending on how long you’ve been talking to that person, and to all the sudden loose contact without knowing why is really mind boggling.
Sometimes when using dating apps, you may find yourself interested in one person, but then lose that interest over time. That is completely valid and normal for people to feel. In result, people may not want to actually tell the person how they really feel and will just cut contact to take the easy way out. Although this may bring that person a sense of guilt, not seeing that other person’s name pop up on their phone everyday my allow them to move on with their life without realizing they might have hurt that other person.
Mental Health
Whether we realize it or not dating apps can actually effect our mental health. Dating apps can potentially increase anxiety and depression, develop self-esteem issues, feeling of rejection and honestly some people might even become addicted. When swiping left and right on people you may come across someone who you might know or someone who maybe you had a crush on in high school. Swiping on people that are familiar to you can make this a little bit more nerve wracking because you know that they have seen you in person and not just through pictures.
Maybe you want this person to match with you, but in the meantime you may be thinking about if they would even want to. Or, maybe you feel the complete opposite and you see someone on the app you know, but you swipe left to avoid them. This may be because you don’t even want people who you work with or went to school with to know that you’re using dating apps because it’s “weird” or “embarrassing”.
A lower self esteem may also blossom after spending some time on these apps. You may see all these people that you may have interest in, but then think to yourself that they are “out of your league” or they wouldn’t be interested in someone like yourself. Honestly, who cares because most of the time you never see any of these people in person and what is the likeliness that someone actually thinks they are “too hot” or “too pretty” for you. So with this just be yourself and stop thinking about what everyone else thinks because you’re just hurting yourself in the end.
Social Interaction
What happened to meeting people at a concert or through a friend? I feel like now it is common to meet your significant other through a dating app or online somehow. Now, there is nothing wrong with that because if you’re truly happy with someone, then, so be it. All I’m saying is, why are we hiding behind a screen when we can try to put ourselves out there in the real world and actually have genuine interactions with people? I have always been a fan of actually talking to people face-to-face because I believe you can learn more about them and the vibe can be completely different than texting. When talking in person with each other you get to see their body language and have a better understanding of what they’re saying rather than trying to interpret things over text.