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SBU | Culture

Be A Complicated Woman

Alexis Serio Student Contributor, St. Bonaventure University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Women’s History Month has just about passed me by. In high school, I was known for having incredible feminist t-shirts, sporting my “Women are Incredible” Colleen Ballinger merch (pre-scandal) nearly every week. My National Honor Society sponsor even noted this collection in front of the entire school district!

This is all to say I have been struggling to feel empowered by anything these days. This was until last week, when I attended a panel entitled “Honoring Our Past: Moving Forward Together and Shaping Our Future.”

This panel was made up of some incredible professors: five women and one man. I was in awe from the moment I walked in and saw the line-up, which included the incredible Dr. Tara Walker and Dr. Taylor Ott. 

The questions for the panel were nothing short of meaningful, highlighting everything from stories that go untold, barriers women face, why we need allies, and even a discussion on how we can raise up young women entering the workforce. 

Dr. Tara Walker, with her background in media effects and mental health, spoke about the need for women to set boundaries and to know when to stop. This idea resonated with me, a reminder I think we all could use. As women, we don’t always use the voices we’ve been given to say enough is enough. We will sometimes fawn, trying to accommodate those around us, even if they don’t deserve our effort or time. 

I was particularly inspired by the discussion Dr. Ott brought up about how feminism is not “a white person project.” Oftentimes, I see feminist voices selling a narrative that only includes white cisgender heterosexual women. It’s devastating that a movement that should be inclusive is so restrictive. 

Dr. Walker also reflected on self-policing as a feminist and not being immune to misogyny. A few months back, I was reflecting on this idea and started to realize my own internalized misogyny. I was still raised in a patriarchy; I’m not immune. 

I think it’s sometimes perceived that to be a “good” feminist, you need to be on the frontlines of social movements. Being a “good” feminist, to me, is about caring deeply for the lives of all women, whether they are straight, lesbian, transgender, Black, brown, or disabled. All women’s voices have a purpose, and silencing one group because they don’t fit your narrative of what feminism should be only hurts progress. 

Many women’s voices have been silenced over the years, and many influential names are never learned. Since so many of women’s contributions have been credited to others, we will never know who truly deserves the credit. 

Another discussion I found particularly intriguing was on the idea of women’s history not being an add-on. Sit with that one for a moment. How often do we credit women’s achievements with being a part of “women’s history” when they are a part of the world’s history? Why do we categorize women’s achievements instead of making them mainstream? 

Dr. Ott had an incredible quote about finding a community that validates you. She said, “When you find an open door, don’t let it shut behind you.” In other words, when you see an opportunity for good, let that community influence you. Let them in and allow them to help you grow. 

The final bit of the panel was on what gives us hope. Dr. Katherine Brelje spoke to Valarie Kaur’s quote, “Is this the darkness of the tomb—or the darkness of the womb?” I felt particularly drawn to this idea. It feels, to me, like everything is crumbling in many parts of the world, and yet I feel more empowered today than I have in ages. 

I finally feel my calling to make an impactful change coming back, but it’s different this time. My eyes have been opened to new potentials, careers that could fulfill me deeply through service. 

I am growing daily–I just needed this reminder from some incredible voices. Happy Women’s History Month, and make sure to give yourself an extra squeeze of love today!

Alexis Serio is an editing chair for the St. Bonaventure University chapter of Her Campus. She is thrilled to be one of the first readers of so many fantastic articles this year! She has been a contributor for Her Campus since Fall 2023 and was a shadow editor during Fall 2024-Spring 2025.

Alexis is a junior Individualized Studies and Spanish double major. Her concentrations are in sociology and theology. Outside of Her Campus, Alexis works for Mt. Irenaeus as a communications intern and SBU's Franciscan Center for Social Concern as a social media intern. She is also a peer coach to freshman and transfer students. Alexis also keeps herself busy as the social media coordinator for Spectrum and as the treasurer for SBU College Democrats!

Alexis loves to read and listen to music! She also loves to chat about books and go on hikes with friends!