During my freshman year, I decided to go through recruitment and join a sorority. After getting a bid from my first choice, I was over the moon excited to run to my new home. However, once I got to the bid day celebration, I found myself anxious, scared, and wanting to leave as soon as possible.Â
While I don’t think of myself as an introvert, I am definitely not the most extroverted person out there; and I find my anxiety getting in the way during events and opportunities such as these. So, as someone who now loves her sorority, and has made some amazing friends from the experience, here are my tips on enjoying sorority life as an introvert, someone with social anxiety, etc. Â
First, reach out to your “pref mom”! Your “pref mom” is the girl(s) you talked to during the preference round of recruitment. She already knows you and liked you enough to offer a bid, so ask her to sit together at chapter, go get coffee, etc.! If you find yourself having trouble during chapter events, find your Pref mom, and soon you’ll get to know her and her friends (aka your new sisters) better!Â
Now these next two may be harder… I know they were for me. New member events are the perfect place to talk to your pledge class (PC), and everyone is in the same boat. I arrived at my first meeting with my pledge class and felt like everyone already had their groups. The truth is, they all just met each other and are looking to meet other girls. Strike up a conversation with the girl you sit next to at these meetings or chapter. After all, they are all your sisters, and they are all so excited to have a new PC to bond with! Even now, as a sophomore, I still talk to girls in my PC that I hadn’t before, and they are just as willing to get to know me now as they were last September.Â
These next few are what helped me the most… Big/Little! Every sorority at Sacred Heart University (SHU) participates in Big/Little. After, you will have a whole fam-line of girls in your chapter who want to be your friends. And just because you didn’t get a certain girl as your Big doesn’t mean you can’t still be friends! I still talk to the girls I went on Big/Little dates with, even though they aren’t my Big. My Big has become my best friend in my Sorority by far, and she is my go-to person to ask to go to events together. Â
Sisterhoods and Fraternity & Sorority Life (FSL) events! Sisterhoods are meant for just that, building the sisterhood! I would go to sisterhoods by myself, not knowing anyone, but just showing my face allowed other, more extroverted girls in my chapter to recognize me and see me as involved and approachable. The same goes for FSL events. Most Sororities require a certain amount of attendance to be able to attend formals, so text in your PC group chat to see if anyone is going and if you can tag along!Â
Finally, reaching out to my president really helped me. I was too anxious to go to sisterhoods, felt completely alone, and told her I was thinking about dropping. We went to get coffee and talk about why I was feeling this way. After this, she gave me some advice and told me that she would always be there as a friend. This led to me becoming friends with other girls on council, and soon I felt totally comfortable showing up to any and all events in my sorority.Â
At the end of the day, if you are in a sorority at SHU, it is because they chose you to be. You got a Bid, You were chosen, and they want to know You. The truth is many girls struggle at first with finding friends and finding their place in their sorority. So, if you are struggling, you aren’t alone! A sorority should not be a place to feel alone, and I hope these few tips can help any girl who is struggling to feel more at home with her sisters.