“Guys, work sesh this weekend?”
My phone screen lights up with a text from my best friend’s group chat. In high school, we all loved to be involved in just about everything around us: clubs, projects and a musical production. But soon we were apart for college, and before we knew it, life had set out different plans for each of us. While they go on to juggle between school and full-time positions, I seem to be the only 20-year-old in my circle left without an internship.
“If they can do it, why can’t I?”
I’d be lying if I said that this hasn’t made me feel extremely peer pressured. The thought “if they can do it, why can’t I?” was eating me up inside. I have scrambled to bookmark job database sites, enquired about roles that I knew wouldn’t utilize my skill set, and considered freelance positions that paid significantly below minimum wage, only to end up with nothing. At one point, my mental health gave in to the stress, and it felt like I’d fallen down a deep pit of despair that was sucking off all of my energy for other responsibilities as well. What’s worst was the fact that my very best friends became people that I felt insecure to be around. I would question myself on whether I was too lazy or actually incompetent when the better answer could be I just wasn’t ready and it’s okay to be so—especially as an undergrad navigating the work scene for the first time.
It took me some time to realize that I was falling prey to the toxic downside of hustle culture. And perhaps my friends, too, with their eyelids heavy and pupils stern but weary, only not quite realizing it yet. The “rise and grind” mentality conditions us to think that time not spent working is time wasted, so there’s no way anyone can afford to rest. Carrying the fear of falling behind, our generation is unanimous in sacrificing the necessities in life: eating, sleeping and even building relationships. We shrug off personal interests while convincing ourselves there will be plenty of time to enjoy later once hustling has paid off, all because we’re still young. Although, how much certainty does the future really hold?
Now I’m not saying we shouldn’t strive for excellence anymore, but hard workers aren’t the only thing hustle culture is creating. Many of us have become relentless with success and would force through any potential signs of burnout as a result. Sadly, this can easily lead to overlooking a decreased quality of life. The good news is it’s not too late for anyone who wishes to find that much-needed balance. The next time my friends and I hang out, I’m going to suggest a coffee break instead. I’ll give them a pat on the shoulder and tell them that it’s healthy to take some time off because slowing down now could serve us sustainably better in the long run. I’ve noticed since I adopted this mindset that it’s become easier for me to be genuinely happy – not only for people around but also with my own progress. At the end of the day, our achievements are ours to reap from and no one else’s. So why contribute to a trend that glorifies collective overexertion, when the most important work we do in life should be on ourselves?