Ah yes, what we all fear: the long-distance relationship. Although they are difficult, frustrating, and sometimes excruciating, for the right person, they are worth it. Trust me, I would know…I am in one right at this moment. Even though being away from the person you love for a majority of your time is really difficult, there are some useful things that you can do to make it easier on yourself and your partner. Everyone will make their mistakes, and I’m no expert, but these are the things that have helped me survive the last year as a long-distance girlfriend.
1. Communication is KEY!
Sorry, I know it’s cliche, but it is honestly the most important piece of advice there is. Opening up the communication channels with your partner is really the only way that your relationship will survive, and even thrive, while you are apart. It is necessary to communicate all of your feelings, good, bad, and hard to say. With the right person, no matter what you are feeling, you will get through it, and it will probably make your relationship stronger in the long run. With that being said, it is important to remember that communication is only effective when it is carried out in the right way. If something is upsetting you, remember to express it in a way that makes your partner feel like you just want them to know so that it does not continue to upset you in the future, which will benefit both of you going forward. If you blame them or intentionally try to make them feel bad, it will only lead to a fight, rather than a constructive conversation.
2. Know Their Schedule
Make sure you always update your partner on your schedule so they will know when you are at work, in class etc. This will keep them from thinking that you are intentionally ignoring them. On the flip side, ask your partner to do the same for you; this simple communication will clear up a lot of mystery for the both of you, and it will be helpful to know what they have been up to so that you can discuss what they did or how it went come the end of the day.
3. Facetime or Call as Much as Possible!
Talking on the phone is simply underrated.. Just hearing your partner’s voice can turn your day around, this I can personally attest to. We all know that tone and humor can sometimes get lost in translation over text, which can lead to a lot of unnecessary worrying. This is why I’m a huge advocate for calling. Try to create a routine with your partner, so that you know when you should be free each day to talk to your partner. Even a ten minute conversation can make all the difference in the world.
4. Always Know When the Next Visit Will Be
Sitting down with your partner and a calendar may seem a little stressful, but it really helps you to plan everything out so there are no surprises. If you do not like to or are unable to plan super far in advance, try to plan out your next visit each time you are with your partner. This will make the time spent apart feel shorter and more manageable because you will always know when the next time you will see them is!
Long distance relationships will probably never get easier, but they are definitely survivable. If you have a partner that gives you the effort and attention you need, even the longest distances can feel manageable.