Shoot Your Shot

by Imani Harris

It’s October. It’s finally starting to cool down, and the leaves are settling nicely on the ground.  Hues of orange, yellow, and brown are taking over, and pumpkins are pretty much dominating the area.  Haunted houses, pumpkin picking, and hay-rides are the activities of choice right now, and what wouldn’t be better than doing those activities with someone you love.

Unfortunately, not everyone is that lucky.

We all know this time of year everyone all of a sudden is looking for a relationship.  Or at least something that mimics one. It’s about to be sweater, soup, and cuddling weather outside, and everyone is trying to find their pick this season.  This season, my friends, is called cuffing season.

Most people already know what this season means, and for those of you who don’t, Urban Dictionary describes this season as a time where “the cold weather and prolonged indoor activity causes singles to become lonely and desperate to be cuffed.”  I love relationships; I always have.  But there’s something about being in one during these months that makes me warm inside. If you’re anything like me, however, finding the right candidate for this position, is never easy. Finding someone who holds my interest longer than a couple weeks has always been my biggest issue, and I thought I was completely out for this season, until I participated in a debate among my followers.

Should a female ever shoot her shot?

Personally, I always used to believe a man should approach a woman, and make the first initiation. I sometimes might put myself in the position by making hints for the guy I’m interested in to shoot his shot, but I never have been the one to make the first move.  This is something I have always felt adamant about, until I began opening up my ears to various opinions, and finding myself in a situation where I actually debated on doing it.  

I posted a poll on my social media, and received many opinions that actually surprised me.  Majority of the guys who answered said it is extremely attractive when a woman makes the first move.  Guys get nervous to when they want to approach a girl; it’s not just one sided.  Girls too said they have no problem doing it.  A friend of mine told me the story of how she and her boyfriend of many years began dating, and it all began with her walking up to him in a restaurant.  

I did receive some other opinions from others who believe the guy should be the initiator.  A lot of these opinion were held by people with more traditional views, or older in age.  

All these answers, however, really opened my eyes to this whole dating thing.  From now on, if I see someone I’m interested in, I might not be so hesitant to shoot my shot.  Instead of going back and forth liking each other’s pictures on Instagram forever, I might just slide in their dm’s and get straight to the point.

Maybe I’ll actually score.  Who knows?