When I first tell people where my college campus is located I get mixed reactions. They either think it is really cool…or they tell me to be careful and watch out for suspicious activity. When I hear them say things like this many questions run across my mind. For starters, do people really think Chicago, downtown specifically, is extremely dangerous? Unfortunately this city has taken on a bad rep for all the violence and crime. Because I have lived in this area my entire life, I have chosen to look past all the negative experiences of others and take the necessary precautions. Though I am more precautious in my city, it is not based on my gender but because everyone should take care of themselves. The other more pressing issue I have begins with the “be careful” speech. My first question is “are they telling me because I am a girl?” Do they give this same speech to guys? I also wonder why can’t I or why don’t I feel safe just as a guy would walking down my street after ten at night. These are just a few questions that I try to process. Let’s start here; young women are often encouraged to carry mace,
a Taser, or to walk in numbers. Why should we as women feel obligated to carry items of protection? The answer that is usually given is because females are easy targets and it’s for their own safety. In society it seems as if women are viewed as little porcelain dolls that are easily broken. Contrary to the belief of many…..we are NOT! We are extremely capable of protecting ourselves in a world where we shouldn’t have to. Women have always been objectified and over sexualized. Concerned mothers tell their daughters that they shouldn’t go out late at night, where skimpy clothes or reveal too much skin. The way a woman dresses shouldn’t make her an easy target for harassment nor should it make a man feel as if she will automatically sleep with him. Clothes should be just that, clothes, worn to cover the body and a way to express who you are as a person. The way women dress and how it’s perceived is so one sided compared to men because if a man walks around without his shirt a very small amount of people, if any, will assume that a girl is going to try and sexually harass him. Parents teach their daughters these things for protection. And there’s nothing wrong with that but there also needs to be a new wave of conversations between parents and their children. These conversations should start at an early age and also be accompanied with actions being exhibited in the home that affirm positive treatment of women. No means no. Women deserve to be treated with equal respect. They should be valued by men and not lusted after. If those ideals were true being acted on, as men and women we wouldn’t be in this predicament. The way we act towards each other starts as children, and the discussions and experiences that we have mold our viewpoints and morals. At night women are precautious out of fear. Fear of being robbed or kidnapped is often enabling and can be paralyzing.
This fear can lead to women being conditioned in thinking that EVERY guy is going to attack them. Not all guys are bad. Every guy you pass on the street will not cat call at you or try to pull you into an alley. So ladies put the mace away and proceed with your evening. But just as men have been conditioned so have we in regards to men and their actions toward us. To women who are reading this: it is okay to carry your protection but remember the “not every guy rule.” When you go out at night be aware of your surroundings and still go out in numbers. There is still nothing wrong with that so continue to be safe. To the guys who will read this or hear about this info: No means no, women are not fragile or your prize to be won, respect there no for what it is, and rework the way you view women in your life. You should also be careful when you go out at night. Safety is for everyone…not just girls. This was written in the hopes that young women and men will have intellectual conversations, disrupt the status quo, and cause change.