In high school, validation was the center of my universe. I wasn’t naturally social, I am quite the opposite really. I never went to parties or hung out with big groups. I was never part of a friend group, and never really cared to be. I had my few, select friends that were my ride-or-dies.
I used Snapchat and Instagram religiously in high school. Every single thing that I posted was for validation, whether I knew it at the time or not. This may not be the case for everyone, but for me, it was. That relationship with posting was very unhealthy. On top of that, Snapchat was just a pit-hole of meaningless numbers and emojis, as if a number showing how many days you’ve sent a photo to someone can define your friendship or connection with said person. I never understood that mindset.
I didn’t know how to have confidence in myself without other people’s comments on my photos or the numbers next to a name.
I had to end the cycle.
I never got into Twitter or Tiktok, so I only had to purge two apps:
I deleted Snapchat completely- I’ve never missed it- it’s been a year. And before that, I had about 10 friends on it and barely used it for a year.
I deleted my Instagram posts on my personal account- no more obsessing over the look of my feed or how many likes I have. I do still use the website on Safari once in a while. I don’t use the app, I don’t even have it downloaded. When I want to post on my art/design account, I download it, post the work I made, and delete the app again. My design account is where I post my work to hopefully grow as a designer/artist. As I do not post photos of myself or anything of my personal life, I have never felt the negative effects of Instagram on my design account. That’s what works for me!
It’s ultimately up to us now to control how social media affects us and if we want to use it as a tool, or as a means for self-sabotage.
I don’t need social media. I don’t feel any obligation to have it.
But I used to.
Since choosing to place no value on social media, my life has changed, truly!
Being present in the moment has become so easy. I don’t bother to worry about what other people are doing every day, nor do I bother worrying about getting validation for what I’m doing every day. I am so much more focused on creating the life that I want. My few close friendships and my relationship has become even more meaningful and full of love and care.
As if it were magic, I now have the time to dedicate to meaningful things and practices in my life; spending time connecting in nature, reading, journaling, creating, dancing, doing yoga, etc.
My connection with myself has become deeper than ever before. I am incredibly self-aware, I understand myself on a deeper level, and I am able to continue to grow without any worry about what others think of me.
It’s a continuous process.
The only constant in this life is change.
I am always changing and evolving and I wouldn’t change that for the world.