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Ask Danielle: To List or not to List?

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Rider chapter.


Dear Danielle: 
My friend insists on carrying around a list of qualities she wants in a man. I mean a physical list in her purse! She says whenever she goes out she has to have it. I think she’s going overboard. What do you think? I’ve always heard that women shouldn’t even have lists because it limits our options. Help! 
 
Dear Itchy Finger: You’re right. Lists do limit options, but this doesn’t have to be a negative thing. Lists are great. You have to have them. You have to know what you want. If you don’t have standards, you’ll settle. Everything on your list you have to make sure you are willing to offer as well. You also have to realize that you are not going to get everything on your list, and that you must be willing to sacrifice some things in order to get what you want. 
 
Lists also help you to maintain your standards. Standards are important and unfortunately, many women forget to uphold them. They settle. They take what they can get and are content with being just that, content. Not fulfilled. Not happy. If you have a list to refer to, you’ll be much more inclined to stick to your guns and go after what you want, and not settle for anything less than what you desire. 

Send your questions to browndan@rider.edu.