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Thank God These Pop-Tart Flavors Don’t Exist

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Regent chapter.

Pop-Tarts were the breakfast food of choice for many of us until we grew into adults. Even now, some of us cannot stand against the temptation of enriched flour and corn syrup. Popular flavors are brown sugar cinnamon, s’mores, red velvet, and of course the classic: strawberry. We remember these treats fondly, but we’re glad the monstrosities below don’t exist. 

Orange Juice and Tooth Paste

The taste of breakfast in a rush before running to catch the bus. It’s disgusting.


These could possibly refreshing? It would probably help with the lack of water people drink these days.

Caesar Salad

Maybe it could work if the crust were cruton? 


These would probably be a hit with Regent students.


These could be great for midterms and finals week. 

Elmer’s Glue

The true taste of childhood.


This brings to mind the disgust of watching people eat whole honeycomb. 


Sometimes you have to eat ground, they say. 


There probably is a Pop-Tart bath bomb out there.


These would help cleanse the palette and end the suffering after trying any of these other flavors.

Tiyra is a senior at Regent University studying English with a concentration in communications. No, she does not want to be a teacher. She is a total advertising and marketing geek (she reads Adweek every morning and AdAge every month). She enjoys writing, reading, learning new things, and good music. She is a fan of Korean dramas, they're a lot of fun! If you're looking for her, you can normally find her where the free food is.