In today’s world of Tik Tok trends and “pick me” girls, the cool people for girls to hang around with are boys. The “cool girl” is portrayed as one who only hangs out with her guy friends, watches sports, and “isn’t like other girls”. But when did we decide that hanging out with other girls isn’t cool? When did it become a bad thing to be like other girls? There is something to be said for having a close group of girlfriends, or even just one great female pal. Nothing compares to the memories you’ll make with those girls and the support they can provide you. That’s not to say that hanging out with men is wrong; guys are cool too! There is just no reason to shun all girls in hopes of being viewed as the “cool girl” who only hangs out with guys. That girl has no one to commiserate with about female specific issues or to celebrate womanhood with. This is why a solid group of girlfriends is a necessity.Â
It can be a challenge to find the perfect group of girls that you mesh with and who feel like your sisters. I’ve had my fair share of friend groups throughout the years, and I loved each of them for different reasons. Despite that, I can now see the through-line of girls who have stuck with me through it all. Whether these girls are childhood friends, school friends, sports friends, work friends, or university friends, you are bound to meet your crowd somewhere. The important thing about a group of girlfriends isn’t who the girls are, how popular they are, or how badly you want to be friends with them. The important thing is how well you mesh together, if you have similar interests, and if they’re loyal and will be there for you. If you’re using your friends to climb a social ladder or they’re using you to do the same, those are not your true friends.Â
Good girlfriends are there for you to have a good night out and a lazy morning with. They’re there to cry with you in bad times and celebrate with you during your best times. They’re not there to compare yourself to and compete against. There should be no toxic femininity or female competition in your friend group. There should only be the best of friends as your self-chosen family. Research on friendship proves that having strong, uplifting, supportive friendships is positively correlated with living longer, better overall wellbeing, and less stress. You become more like the people you hang out with and vice versa, which emphasizes the importance of surrounding yourself with people who inspire you and make you happy. Other girls understand what you’re going through and can empathize with you. There is no reason why we should be demonizing female relationships and portraying the ideal girl as having a ton of male friends. Now I’m not saying to completely ditch your guy friends, just don’t forget about the importance of your girls as well. This is further proven in the tragic tale of girls getting partners and leaving all of their girlfriends in the dust. What happens when you get in a fight with your significant other? What do you do on nights when your partner is hanging out with their own friends? Even worse, what do you do when you break up? Read: girlfriends.Â
Personally, I don’t want to be told that I’m not like other girls. I aspire to be like some of the coolest people I know, who just happen to be girls. Nothing in the world compares to girls nights, shopping trips, and gossip dates—I mean coffee dates. Moral of the story, girls rock. Don’t forget it.Â