Returning to school after reading week has always been the hardest time for me as a university student. First semester, I was still adjusting to living so far away from home. I didn’t really know who my friends were and I had constant FOMO surrounding my social life. This year has been substantially better in regards to finding myself in Kingston and developing amazing friends. However, I still struggle with another core part of being a university student: the school work.
To say I had a mental breakdown this week would be an understatement. To make a long story short, I finally bit the bullet and dropped my minor. It was making me question all of my life choices. I hated the subject, I hated doing the work, and all it brought me was misery. However, as someone who finds joy in academic validation, giving up on something school-related was incredibly difficult to come to terms with. It led to SO MUCH questioning, doubt and anxiety around my future which felt horrible.
But it had to happen. And sometimes life is just like that! Or as the kids say… it do be like that sometimes. While it obviously was not my first choice to give up on my minor and start a completely new (and hopefully more enjoyable) one, it happens to the best of us. Look at those people in your classes who seem incredibly smart and on top of things—I can PROMISE you they are struggling with their work and questioning not only the content but what they’re doing, just like the rest of us.
But isn’t that what university is for? Being 18 years old and expecting to have the next 50 or so years of your life planned out is impossible. However, you’re apparently supposed to know even earlier, as you’re forced to ensure you have all the prerequisites to apply for programs. But how can someone possibly expect a 10th grader to have all the answers to their future? You’re going to change your mind, you’re going to have mental breakdowns, but most importantly, you’re going to end up wherever you’re supposed to be.
So needless to say, the first week back from reading week historically has not had a good rep in my books. I’m sure everyone feels similarly as we all drown in piles of homework and midterms. But no matter how anxious, worried, or stressed you feel, know that everything is going to be okay and that everything happens for a reason.
My advice is to just take a deep breath and relax. During stressful times, never forget to take time for yourself and do what you love. University has its moments where it feels like the worst experience ever, and succeeding feels more difficult than it was in the past. But understand that everyone who has ever walked the streets of University Avenue, or spent countless nights studying in Stauffer library, has struggled at some point. Maybe I wrote this article because I needed to hear these words myself, but more than anything, I hope they bring you a little bit of peace.