As I’m writing this I’ve just gotten back from a way too short reading week which featured a typical lack of reading, but was a much-needed break that gave me a lot of time to reflect over the first few weeks of both the new semester and the New Year. While I’ve made less progress on my goals than I would’ve liked, this has allowed for some learning experiences and general modifications to some goals.
The aim of this article is to be okay with being vulnerable with yourself and understanding when the sights for goals may have been set a little too high. Even though we all know it’s unrealistic to expect that we are going to wake up on January 1st and be a completely different person, it’s an expectation that we secretly wish to be true. Personally, I expected that by now I would be way less addicted to my phone, a consistent reader (I may need to adjust my Goodreads goal whoops!), someone who goes to the gym multiple times a week and eats healthily, and, mostly shockingly, I thought I wouldn’t be a procrastinator anymore. Listen, I know these goals are very very ambitious, especially to expect over two months, but I think the end of December brings out the ambition in people and it fades away quickly as the new year begins.
Watching everyone else make their goals at the end of December made me think that I could flip my life around in an instant, and along with many other people, I’m reeling from looking at the past year and seeing a lack of immediate change. I still need my phone in my hand constantly, I don’t read every night, I go to the gym a few times a week but less than I hoped, and I am certainly procrastinating more than ever before. But, two months in is like a bit of a trial run! Clearly going cold turkey on all my bad habits wasn’t the most sustainable way to develop new habits, so it’s okay to re-approach these goals.
Contrary to popular belief, the end of December and beginning of January is not the only time that we are allowed to make new goals! If you aren’t super thrilled with where you’re at in terms of your New Year’s resolutions, it’s more than okay to take a step back and decide what’s going to work for you, and how you intend on adding these habits into your daily life. The first thing I like to do is assess what exactly isn’t working and how I plan to change that. By pointing out the root of the issue, it becomes easier to narrow down your goals and tackle barriers that may be preventing you from achieving your resolutions.
Using my main goals as examples, I’m going to start being conscious of my screen time over the next week, then decide to set an appropriate limit on my phone. If I am typically using my phone for 5 hours a day, I’ll start to integrate a 4.5-hour limit, just something small to get started. To improve the amount that I read, I’ll first find more interesting books, then just try to set short timers for how long I want to sit down and read. Going to the gym more consistently involves a bit of schedule rearranging since a common issue I’ve been having is that there’s not enough time for me to go. So, I’m going to take a look at my schedule and plan out specific study times, classes, office hours, and other responsibilities so there will be some clear spaces where I can schedule a trip to the gym. For anyone else who is looking to go to the gym more often, I think a common belief is that you need to go for like an hour or two or it’s not worth going, which isn’t true at all. Even when you have just an hour between classes you can pop in, lift a few weights, and leave in less than 45 minutes. Finally, tackling procrastination is by far my biggest struggle, especially this past semester. Personally, I think to-do lists are going to become my best friend. Setting weekly and daily to-do lists will allow all my major and minor tasks to be visible all day so I’m able to set both larger weekly goals and minor steps to accomplish those goals. For example, if I have an essay due in a week, my daily to-do list might just be “Have research done today.” You can also get a friend to use as an accountability buddy. Maybe by studying together or just having them steal your phone for an hour while you work.
So, now is the time to look back on your goals for the year and be okay with modifying them to fit your lifestyle. No one has ever just woken up one morning and developed all the traits they dreamt of having and stuck with them consistently. Be okay with setting more realistic goals, and don’t beat yourself up if they don’t work out. It’s okay to keep trying and eventually, you will discover what works for you.