Entering my fourth year of University feels extremely surreal. I am starting to look around in crowds and see I am substantially older than the majority of the people around me. I am not quite sure how time sped by me like this. I can still vividly recount every experience of my first year; all the weird new emotions, interesting new people, forced awkward lunches in the caf. At the time, I felt like an imposter, as I’ve always seen myself as younger than I actually am. I could not comprehend that I was in university, as I felt like I was freshly 16 at most.
Indeed, I still feel like I could be freshly 16. This new reality that I am coming to the last of my school days is so hard to grasp, and I thought I could start off this year of articles with something quite simple, almost like a self-reflection to see how my mindset has shifted throughout my early university days. I may not be a whole lot wiser, but I am certainly older, and I wanted to share some words of advice to people at the beginning of their university journey.
- It’s Okay to Sit Some Things Out
One of the biggest changes I have seen in myself is my ability to say no to things. In first year, the fear of missing out can be an all-consuming sickness. For me, it felt as though every minute spent indoors was a minute someone else was making a best friend, getting into a relationship, having the time of their life, or simply doing their youth right. Yes, you should definitely try to put yourself out there as much as possible, but don’t be afraid to simply take a break! Although it may seem as though everyone else can handle the go-go-go of University life, it is certainly not for everyone. A night off every once in a while is not going to hurt you. Check in with yourself and see what you truly need.
2. Going Outside of Your Comfort Zone Can Have Limits
I do think there is so much value in intentionally doing things that make you uncomfortable. Growth will always be uncomfortable. Still, it’s important to check in with yourself and see where that discomfort comes from, and how you can challenge it from a place of healthy intention. If you truly understand yourself, you’ll be able to examine every situation outside of your comfort zone in terms of the following: Does this thing push me outside of my boundaries because it causes fear and discomfort, or does this thing push me outside of my boundaries because it conflicts with my values and the person that I want to be? The difference between the two is important for choosing when to step outside your comfort zone.
3. Not Everyone You Meet Needs to Stick Around
People come in and out of your life for various reasons. It is very important to accept that not everyone will be a forever friend. I think one of the best things about university is getting to meet so many unique people, whether in passing or in deeper connections. Accept that different people will float in and out of your life, and that this is entirely normal. It’s okay to explore meeting different people and figuring out who exactly you want to keep around.
All in all, nothing I’ve written here is revolutionary in the slightest, although I do think these words would have been useful for me a few years ago. So, to any first years who may be reading this, I hope this short and sweet article helps get you through the next bit.