As many of us know, growing up is all about making mistakes and learning from them. From birth, we become life-long students; our teachers include our family, our friends, our educators, the world around us, and nearly anyone else we encounter. Here are some lessons I wish I’d learned before turning 20.
- Not all friends will be life-long friends, and that’s okay
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I’ve always been someone with a small group of close friends, who I love fiercely and would bend over backwards for. Something I learned the hard way, however, is that the friends you love today won’t necessarily be around tomorrow.
- You don’t need to spend so much time worrying about what you want to do with your life
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Looking to the future and planning for it is important, but it is equally valuable to enjoy and appreciate where you currently are in life.
- Sometimes, it’s okay to be selfish
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Helping others and being considerate of them is great, but doing so at the expense of your own needs isn’t.
- Being a hurricane isn’t a bad thing
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Be authentically and unapologetically you. You shouldn’t have to change or conceal parts of yourself.
- Few things in life are permanent
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Life, and all it contains, is dynamic. We are in a constant state of change and growth; embrace it.
- Language (the words we use and when we use them) matters
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Be mindful of what you say and to whom you say it.
- It’s okay to let go of what happened in the past
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Learning from our past is important, but holding on to it and letting it dictate our actions in the present can be self-sabotage.
- Earning money is really hard, learning how to manage it and save is even harder
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Learn. How. To. Save! Adulting is hard enough as it is; adding in financial concerns just makes it worse.
- Moving out changes your relationship with your parents
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For awhile, you may find yourself in a sort of limbo between your parents treating you like both a child and an adult. It can be incredibly frustrating and confusing on both ends, but it’s normal.
- Moving back in with your family is NOT easy
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I can be awkward for awhile as you learn to live with each other again, but don’t worry. Eventually, new routines will be found and everything will work out.
- Do the things you love, even when they aren’t what is popular
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Embrace your inner weirdo! Life is too short and uncertain to waste time trying to conform to societal ideas of what is popular.
- Read as much as you can while you have the chance
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Books offer a chance to see the world through someone else’s eyes and to experience that which you wouldn’t otherwise have the chance. Life gets busy, but don’t forget to take time for yourself and read.
- Remembering lost loved ones isn’t just about going to their final resting place
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Feeling guilt over not visiting an urn or a cemetery is a waste of time; honouring your loved ones and remembering them can be done in so many other ways. Whether it be wearing an old piece of their jewellry or eating their favourite meal, there are a multitude of ways to keep their memory close to us.
- Cherish your family and the time you get to spend with them
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As I said before, nothing in life is permanent.
- Its okay to be fat
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…or skinny, or anything in-between. I feel so sad when I think about all the time I have spent hating my body and criticising myself over it.
- Take chances; you never know where they could lead you
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Many of my favourite memories have occurred as a result of spur-of-the-moment decisions!
- There’s a difference between self-care and self-indulgence
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Putting of a face mask? Ok! Eating a pint of ice cream every week? Not so much.
- Your definition of success and happiness will change over time, and that’s okay
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You’re allowed to change and to let your dreams to evolve.
- My beliefs aren’t a weakness or something to hide
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Speak and live your truth.
- Although it is easy to cringe at who I was in the past, it is not something to be ashamed of
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Who you are today is a culmination of who you were in the past and what you filled you life with. Honour your past self.