I had never lived alone in my entire life, until this semester when I was placed in a room by myself. There were many things that I could have done with the situation. Unfortunately, I chose to sulk about it at the beginning of the semester.
I would grieve the fact that I barely had any friends, but barely even make an effort to try and find new ones. It was addicting being stuck in my room, but it was hard dealing with my own thoughts. I am pretty much alone 24/7.
It’s funny because there are people who don’t like roommates and actually want to be alone. As an introvert, I thought I would be the same way, but that wasn’t really the case. I realized how much I needed social interaction in order to survive.
I missed the atmosphere back home. Everything just felt more comforting. I knew what to expect. I missed my family and the food from home.
Academically, I felt more isolated than I ever did before. I felt as if I was the only one struggling in all of my classes.
One thing I’ve realized is that once you live alone, you’re basically alone with your own thoughts, and for me, that’s literally been the scariest time of my life I’ve ever had to deal with. It was definitely not the type of living situation I chose to be in, but without this period of time, I wouldn’t have had to actually sit with my thoughts and learn about who I am as a person. It sucked that things had to change, but I’ve learned to be more resilient. Learning how to not be codependent on people took time for me to grasp, but once I was able to explore campus and do fun things on my own, I realized that maybe I don’t have to do everything with someone else.
What helped me tremendously with living alone is distracting myself and taking frequent breaks. I haven’t watched more Netflix in my entire life than I have this semester! Also, inviting friends over to my room helped (keeping in mind COVID guidelines, of course).
I’m definitely doing much better now, and surprisingly, I think I’ll miss being alone! Even though I’ve had a rough time in the beginning of the semester, I’ve definitely learned to take care of myself. I now have an elaborate night routine I like to get into before I go to sleep. I play music whenever it’s a bit too silent. I’m able to watch Netflix with my family. It’s nice to be able to feel connected even when I do feel really isolated.
I may not be living alone anytime soon, but this experience has prepared me for living alone in the future when I graduate. I know how to look out for myself now.
If you haven’t lived alone yet, I can definitely say that once you do, it’ll be a huge change in your life. You’ll learn more about yourself that you never have before. It may be a huge change to get used to, but once you do, you’ll feel more comfortable being alone.