A Recap of 'The Bachelor' Week 7: Leaving Ladies and Hometown Honeys

First of all, this is my first time being apart of the Bachelor Nation and I’m not quite sure how I feel about it. HOWEVER, I will admit that the events that have transpired are too juicy to pass up. Especially Week 7. Now if you’re a proud ‘Bachelor’ watcher, I’m sure that you’ve seen last week’s episode. Now If I were to put it into words it’d be “Girl, why?” and “Colton, go home you’re drunk.” 

    Week 7 begins with a recap of last week’s episode, week 6. As you probably know, three girls (RIP Sydney, Katie, and Demi) spilled some freaking hot tea to Colton informing him that some of his baes weren’t there for the right reasons. Following that bomb, understandably, he does a combination of cussing, crying, complaining, and this weird thing where he brings his shoulders to his neck. The neck movement was honestly pretty funny. I might have laughed. Anyways, ALL OF THOSE COPING MECHANISMS I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND. 

But here’s where it gets interesting…

    As he starts off the episode back home in Colorado, he decides to spend the day on a one and one with Tayshia. And it was there that, after being asked her opinion on Katie’s warning, TAYSHIA RATS CASSIE AND CAELYNN OUT FOR BEING DISGENIUNE, NOT READY FOR MARRIAGE, AND WANTING TO BE ON THE BACHELORETTE. Which after hearing that of course I chuckled. 

 Anyways, despite the seriousness, Tayshia, being the suave girl she is, scores the rose. 

    The next one on one, conveniently, is with Caelynn. I’m just gonna skip to the good part: he confronts her and as upset as she is, she does an eerily good job at defending herself. To me, it seems her pageant training is coming out…Regardless, in the end, the pageant queen makes it out with the rose. 

    It was back in the house that Caelynn decided to finally throw hands. In a I-wanna-rip-your-hair-out-but-I’m-gonna-restain-myself way, she saunters up to Tayshia, smiling sweetly, before gently tapping her shoulder and asking if she wanted to chat. While conversation starts off cordial, like we would all expect, it totally turns hostile. And to save you some time, they basically agree to disagree. AND WHILE I, AND PRETTY ALL BACHELOR NATION, SITS IN CONFUSION, all I can honestly say is that Tayshia clearly believes that Caelynn is still there for the wrong reasons. Not only that, Caelynn still remains in her confusion as to why Tayshia would make up random lies

While all this is transpiring, Hannah B. is on a one on one…at Colton’s parents' house…And in what seems like an honestly intimidating atmosphere, Colton and Hannah B. are separated by Colton’s parents. And it’s then that we finally get the truth. While pure Hannah B. is completely head over heels for the clearly confused Bachelor, Colton is unfortunately not in the same place. And it’s that night that he sends the Southern Belle home (I say as a single tear streams down my face). Hannah B., of course, was blind-sided, and, to me, gave a particularly emotional exit interview. Even the toughest viewers’ heartstrings were pulled.

 And finally, as the episode winded down, we were left with the notoriously juicy group date. It started with the just recently kissed Heather and her request to go home on account of the fact that she wasn’t absolutely sure of her feelings for Colton. They hugged goodbye, after SHE CURVED HIS KISS. I, of course, was dying of laughter. 

    Following that, I’m gonna sum it up really quick, Cassie and Kirpa got into a fight. Cassie cried because she just couldn’t understand why Kirpa would blatantly make up lies. On the other hand, Kirpa stared in awe at Cassie and her antics as Kirpa calmly explained her reasoning. 

    Then finally comes the group dinner and here’s the kicker: there are two roses and three girls. 

    After DEAD SILENCE, Colton pulled Hannah G. aside and gave her a rose. Then, HERE’S THE CRAZY PART, Caelynn INTERRUPTS the group date and defends Cassie. The California blonde looked completely hopeful as she watched Caelynn leave. Kirpa, contrarily, looked utterly crushed. I kind of felt for her. And it was then that fate was sealed and the Indian beauty was sent home (RIP honestly). 

TO WRAP IT ALL UP:

HONEYS GOING TO HOMETOWNS: Cassie, Tayshia, Hannah G., and Caelynn. 

LADIES LEAVING IN LIMOS: Hannah B., Heather, Kirpa 

Guy, this week was a crazy one, but honestly there’s only one thing I’m thinking about…

WHEN WILL COLTON JUMP THE DANG FENCE?!