It’s beginning to look a lot like formal season. That was embarrassingly not smooth, unlike how I am about to talk you through obtaining your formal date, which I hope will help you in some way. The spring semester is when a majority of sororities and fraternities hold their formals. Whether you are dying to spend a chaotic weekend away with frat boys or are in the process of seeking out a date to your own formal dance, I am here to tell you how to succeed in getting exactly what you want – most likely an unworthy frat boy to claim “yours” on your next Instagram post.
Both receiving an invite and pursuing someone in order to have a date begin the same way. My biggest piece of advice is to network. My best friend in currently sprinting in the marathon to find her one night special someone for her formal. I told her to dedicate a week to networking. If you are not going to be assertive and ballsy you will absolutely not end up with what you want. You’re wondering what is “networking” in this context…? If you don’t have tinder, you’re already behind. Pause and download it right now. Make the profile and get after it. I’ve heard some people say they feel bad talking to multiple people on Tinder at the same time – there is nothing to be ashamed of there. The entire point of a dating app is to feel out the playing field and pursue the interesting possibilities. You are running through all your bases. Having options is the name of the game. You can play it cool and wait for them to message you, but if the bio strikes a spark, no shame in being the one to start the conversation. Make sure you’re checking in on the those chats every night of you networking week, and if there’s any potential at all for this kid to be contender in the race for formal, obtain the snapchat, or other preferred contact.
Moving on to the OG yet underrated networking platform. Our age group underestimates sliding into the DMs. It’s really not a popular tactic anymore with our generation and I think we need to bring it back. This is not to say that nobody uses the Instagram DMs to message a love interest, but it’s more and more rare, and easier to send pointless snapchats. Personally, I think the DMs are a great resource to use in picking a love victim and trying to pursue them. At this point, everyone follows hundreds of people, many that we think are cute but have no reason to slide in. So, here is what you’re going to do. Doesn’t matter what your relationship with this person is, if you feel this is a prospective formal date, next time they put something on their story you’re going to slide up and comment something related to it. Maybe you white lie, but the conversation needs to begin somehow.
I already know what the next dilemma every girl is thinking. No story content to work with? Fine. Actually better, because we want to assert our bold character and we’re sliding in anyway. I can personally vouche for this next technique because I have used it myself. This only really works assuming that this male goes to your school. Depending on what his vibe is, you’re going to slide in with a “hey so random but I thought I saw you (last night/or at the gym/or in my big lecture, etc.) Or maybe it was just your twin lmao?” Something along those lines. He’ll probably nicely say that it wasn’t him, to which you now launch the flirt. Most likely he’ll play it cool since you haven’t established the flirt boundary yet, meaning you must initiate. Girl boss power has now been activated and the fire is starting. You are going to come back with a “haha that’s unfortunate” or, “that’s a bummer I was hoping it was you.” Maybe you up the stakes and pull a “damn my bad lol that’s one lucky guy to be looking so similar to you.” Make something up that shows him this is more than purely a friend reaching out.
Another reason I like the DMs for formal date seeking purposes is that by actually initiating a conversation, you can start to pick up on some character and slight personality in texting, whereas the picture sending feature of snapchat is the cop out to having a conversation. It is so unfortunately easy to send meaningless pictures of your face back and forth all day. The only thing that’s benefitting both parties is a consistent rush when their name shows up, followed by an extremely underwhelming picture of him not paying attention in class. In terms of finding someone to spend an entire night or weekend with, starting your date hunt snapchatting an average college aged male is not going to set you up for success.
I want to make note that as much as this seems more geared towards finding a date to your own personal formal, these strategies can be used to start the basis of getting your “in” to the frat formal weekend. Whether you are talking through apps or actively talking to men when you go out, a nice ratio of investigating through steady conversation to flirt comebacks within your chatting can secure that invite.
Dating apps and social media bases are covered, but in person is your real opportunity to show them what you’re made of. Interacting in person not only superficially demonstrates not only the level of premier arm candy you could be all weekend, but better yet your real personality and conversation game. If after your 30-minute chat at a party or bar is exhausting, boring, or anywhere near soul sucking, imagine an entire weekend with this male you will be somewhat forced to be latched to. No. We don’t settle for being uncomfortably unpleased no matter how fun it sounds or how hot his hair is. With that said revisit our socializing angles and go out and dedicate one night to networking, and the other night channel your inner intense confidence. Wearing your confidence power lady boss suit out will attract male energy. I am not even joking. Girls, you are 10 times more attractive to someone when you have your effortlessly cool, unphased (by other men), fun, confident girl glow on. Make your pitch, advocate yourself, go in for the kill, obtain the contact information, and still have a fun night with your girlfriends (because you know I am the biggest supporter of a raging girl’s night).
Remember to play to your strengths when seeking out a temporary date interest. Use all your resources, play the flirt game on all platforms, and see what provides the best results. Remember, as much as you want to have some hot stuff good lookin’ hunk to show the world on your Instagram formal post, having a fun and enjoyable night with your date is most important. Make the first move, be assertive, be flirty, and be intentional. Lastly, make it clear that after your initial trigger flirt, they are the ones who should be dying to get invited. When you make up your mind, whoever comes out on top will receive a very relaxed text asking for their attendance. In no way, shape, or form are not going to show how many excited butterflies are whipping around your stomach. You staged the interview process, and one lucky winner should be the one salivating over future you in a dress. You are an awesome one of the kind, priceless royalty that has the potential to wear her large sparkly confidence covered crown for a fun night or weekend. So let the networking games begin.