There are girls who move through the world like they’re carrying something fragile.
Not a suitcase. Not a secret.
But, everyone else’s expectations.
If you’re reading this, maybe you’re the girl who carries too much. Maybe you grew up learning how to read the emotional temperature in a room before you even step in. Or, you learned far too early that love feels safer when you are more agreeable. You’ve mastered the art of taking up the least amount of space, not because you want to but because silence was easier than the idea of disappointing someone.
This is for you.
For those who say, “it’s fine,” while your lips form a soft smile but your chest feels tight. Who hears herself apologizing, not even knowing what she is apologizing for. Who edits her texts, her tone, her needs and her entire existence just to keep the peace.
You are the girl who fixes the mood at the pregame, who remembers everyone’s birthdays, who checks on others even when no one checks on you. You are the girl who gives grace like it’s free and asks for nothing because you’re terrified od requesting anything would make you “too much.”
You don’t break people’s hearts. You break your own first so they don’t have to.
And, you’ve convinced yourself this is a strength.
But here’s a truth you might not know how to hold yet: You do not have to bleed to be loved.
Somewhere along the blurred line, you learned that the safest version of you is the smallest version. That love is often earned by sanding down your edges, lowering your voice and folding yourself into softness.
Shrinking yourself is not the same as being good. Being good has never been the same as being loved.
You are allowed to disappoint someone and survive it. You are allowed to say no without writing a novel-length explanation afterward. You are allowed to want something loudly, clearly, without an apology and without explaining yourself.
The world will not fall apart when you choose yourself.
Read that again.
I know you don’t believe it the first time; many rarely do. We’ve spent so many years making sure no one feels abandoned that we’ve quietly abandoned ourselves. However, people who truly love you won’t call you difficult for having needs.
They won’t leave because you finally decided to show a boundary. They won’t punish you for being human, tired, overwhelmed or honest. They will stay. It won’t be because you are perfect or selfless, but because you are real.
And the people who disappear when you stop performing? They were held together by your effort, not love. Let them go. So here is my love letter to you: those who try so hard not to disappoint anyone that they forget they deserve softness, too.
You are worthy when you say no. You are worthy when you are messy. You are worthy when you rest. You are worthy when you breathe and dare to take up space. You have spent so long protecting everyone else’s feelings.
Maybe it’s time to protect your own.