Cosmopolitan says PDA is back and in full swing. According to their recent article: Is it Just Us? Or Is Everyone Into PDA Again? the popularity of shows like “Love Island” and several Hollywood hard launches has gotten people hungry for some raunchy public romance.
Generation Z’s response to this idea was: absolutely not. Many people are adamant about keeping relationship intimacy private, turned off by the idea of PDA being on the rise. But what if our generation’s discomfort with PDA goes further than a simple disdain for public make-outs? There must be a deeper reason for people’s overwhelming fear of public intimacy.
Maybe carrying the world in our pockets has blinded us to looking up and allowing ourselves to exist in the world around us. Intimacy is simple and idealized in media and television, yet far more striking and unsettling to witness in person. The last thing anyone wants is to see two strangers getting it on at a restaurant. But at the same time, what’s so bad about a hickey or holding hands in the street?
Public affection isn’t the problem; it’s public interaction that’s lacking. We are a generation allergic to connecting with strangers in person. Spontaneous face-to-face interaction is a lost art. Whether it’s making conversation with someone in your lecture or smiling at the person beside you in the elevator, people have lost the ability to properly acknowledge the people around them.
If people weren’t programmed to walk with their heads down, to avoid eye contact and any sort of personal exchange, maybe they wouldn’t be so averse to PDA. In a world where everything can be instantaneously captured, shared and judged, people find themselves overly aware of their own public image. Making people less inclined to make public displays of anything at all.
Why are people so comfortable with watching relationships get heated on an island in Fiji, but can’t fathom the idea of seeing real-world connections in real time? In the age of influencers, people have gotten so used to observing idealized lifestyles that they’ve forgotten to experience their own. It seems people have given up on their own love stories and have become infatuated with on-screen romance. So, is on-screen romance setting an unrealistic standard for love? Or have we neglected the capacity of modern dating?
It’s difficult to actualize movie romance in contemporary real-world dating. But romance can look different for everyone. It’s time to redefine what romance means to you. Romance isn’t always defined by the quality of a bouquet or the eloquence of a love note. Romance can mean being absolutely wowed by a Hinge date gone right.
Perhaps it’s time to lean into Cosmo’s idea and “stop pretending that love is embarrassing.” Perhaps public make-outs aren’t the enemy. The enemy is fear. Fear of being noticed and fear of each other. Let yourself be known, especially if you’re in love. Life is too short to judge people for getting handsy at a bus stop or to ignore the many lives that surround you every time you leave the house.