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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at PSU chapter.

With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, you may be wondering if your boo is actually your boo. Do you find yourself still in that awkward phase between “casually dating” and calling him yours? Then Valentine’s Day just might be the perfect time to define the relationship! It can serve as the perfect platform to bring up questions about the nature of your relationship without it seeming too overbearing. You might not need to have a conversation, however, if his actions speak for him. Here are five ways to find out how to DTR this Valentine’s Day.

 

Decide if it’s what you want

Forget about him for a second. Is a real, committed relationship what you really want? Do you truly see yourself with this person going forward?  Do you have the time and effort to dedicate to making a relationship work? If not, then maybe it’s better to wait it out or cut it off.

 

Pay attention to his language

How does he introduce you to his friends? Does he use more formal or casual titles such as “friend,” “neighbor” or “study buddy,” or simply call you by your name? Or does he call you his “girl,” “girlfriend” or some variation of the above? This one could go either way, though, because he might not know how you feel until you let him know.

 

Let his actions speak for him

This one is pretty self explanatory. How does he act around you when his friends are around? If he’s all over you in private, but barely says a word to you in public situations, he may be shy, or he may be inadvertently letting you know he’s just not taking this all that seriously. If you’re his girl, he should be proud – and he should want the world to know! (But at the very least, his close friends).

 

Don’t beat around the bush

If you want to know where you two stand, sometimes the best way is to just ask him! Chances are he’ll be straightforward, but either way you’ll likely have your answer. If he seems wishy-washy, however, he just might not be ready to have “the” conversation yet. If you’re okay with his indecisiveness, just be real with yourself; be prepared to eventually accept an answer you might not want to hear. Basically, love who you are (I know, easier said than done) and realize you don’t need him to complete you – only to complement you and your uniqueness.

 

Listen to your friends

Sometimes your close friends can see things about your relationship that you might not. They are an objective third party who only want the best for you, after all. Obviously, it’s important to have your own opinion, but sometimes they may be able to see things you can’t. Trust your friends!

 

Hopefully, this clears some things up for you and your bae. You might not always get the answer you want, but chances are it’s the answer you just might need. If all else fails, lean on your friends, because they’ll likely be there to catch you when you fall.

I am currently a senior at Penn State pursuing a degree in Criminology and Sociology. If I'm not running, I'm writing, and if I'm not writing, I'm probably watching true crime TV. Lover of scary movies, spicy foods, and all things Disney.