5 Childhood Fears I Still Have Now

It’s spooky season... which means it’s also try-not-to-cry-as-I-watch-scary-movies season, too-much-fake-blood season and I’m-an-adult-I-shouldn’t-be-this-scared season! From Penn State’s haunted campus to failing midterms, October is certainly a time of fear - especially if you’re scared of everything like I am. With that being said, I’ve always been easily frightened, so here are five fears I had as a child that still haunt me as an adult:

 

1. Being kidnapped

I think this is a fairly relatable fear; there’s nothing comforting about being taken by a stranger. This fear honestly used to drive me crazy, and was one of the main reasons why I begged my parents for my first cellphone. Today, I’m still scared of being kidnapped, but I’m also more aware of the often brutal implications of being kidnapped like sex trafficking and torture; I’m glad my 7-year-old self never thought about that. So yes, I’ll continue to walk with my keys in between my fingers like Wolverine, thank you very much.

 

2. Failure

I’ve been a perfectionist since first grade, and it’s led me to develop a huge fear of failure and rejection. If I didn’t color inside the lines, I failed. If I didn’t kiss a** and make the teacher love me, I failed. While these past examples are still pretty good metaphors for how I feel now, I’m scared of other failures like failing out of college or disappointing my parents. But hey, if you succeed at failing, aren’t you still technically succeeding at something?

 

3. Thinking my mom is an alien

First grade was a wild time, ok? Lord knows how, but I was convinced for at least a good three months that my mother was an alien, despite her pleading otherwise. I legitimately couldn’t confide anything to her because I was sure she’d report back to her “superiors” and cross me. Don’t ask me where this fear came from - I have no idea. While I don’t think my mom is an alien anymore (most of the time), I do have my doubts about her being completely human. How does she instantly know I made a bad choice from across the state? Even worse, how does she know to call immediately after? It’s like the most unfair superpower ever.

 

4. People breaking into my house/room

When I was 13, I was terrified of finding a stranger in my home. I triple checked every door in the house to make sure it was locked. I checked first floor windows. I checked second floor windows (just in case there was a burglar with a super tall ladder.) While I’ve gotten better at not compulsively checking locks on doors, I admit that I’ll still get out of bed at night every once in a while just to check that the door is locked.

 

5. Spiders

Let’s be real: you’re either scared of spiders, or you’re lying. There's nothing natural about something with eight legs. I’ve known it since I was four, and I still know it 14 years later; I will still call someone else to kill the spider for me and, no, that will never change.