I met my fiance about halfway through my freshman year of college. We instantly hit it off and have been together ever since. To make everything even more incredible, we got engaged last summer. I am so very happy, I love him and I love being in a serious relationship.
(Photographer: Amy Wurdock)
As a junior in college, and only being 21, I do receive criticism about my choice to get married early. A lot of the concerns that I hear are common ideas that float around about serious relationships college. So I want to get a few things straight: here are 6 common myths about being in a serious relationship in college and what the truth really is.
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Myth: Being in a relationship means no more parties and no more fun. Truth: I still go out and love to go out. When I do go out, I always have someone waiting for me when I get home (Plus I have someone to always get me taco bell at 2am). I also have the option to stay home, cuddle and go to bed at 9pm. Both are just as enjoyable.
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Myth: Being in a relationship will distract you from school work. Truth: A good relationship means building each other up. When my fiance was in college we used to study together all the time and encourage each other to stay focused. Even though he has graduated, he still pushes me to do the best I can in school. He will sit with me in coffee shops, proofread my papers, and even make me pancakes the morning of a test. He is the most supportive person in my life.
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Myth: You’re still learning what love is and aren’t ready for that kind of commitment. Truth: I think this argument stems from the same idea that tells people it’s okay to act like wild children until they are 29. If people want to do that, that is great! But that isn’t necessarily what I want. Although, I don’t suggest people jump straight into relationships if they aren’t ready. I didn’t think I could handle a relationship when I met my fiance, but very soon into our relationship I was certain this was something I wanted for a long time. I am still learning how to love, and how to be a good partner, but we are learning that together. I think that this is something every couple has to do whether they are college, are in their thirties, or even older than that.
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Myth: You are still figuring out who you are and can’t handle a relationship Truth: It is true that I am still trying to figure myself out. I am not exactly sure what I want to do or where I want to do it, but I do know that whatever I decide in life I have someone who supports me and loves me. My fiance is still figuring himself out too, we grow together, and make decisions together and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
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Myth: There is too much temptation and it’s more fun to have freedom. Truth: This is probably a comment I hear the most, and honestly, it’s just not true. Most of the guys i’ve seen in college are living out their glory days, and run from commitment. I would be crazy to ever leave the loving relationship I have and I would never want to. I don’t really understand the freedom thing. I’m not locked away in a tower, I can still go out with my friends, do things I want. I don’t feel trapped or locked down, and if you do you’re probably not in a good relationship. I hear about women my age all the time complaining about the boys they hang out with and that just makes me more happy that I’ve found someone who treats me right 100% of the time.
I think the moral of the story is if you find the right person, it doesn’t matter how old you are. You can have a beautiful relationship in college if you are both mature, and know what you want.