Valentine’s Day has come and gone and if you are anything like me, you were pretty annoyed and over all the posts of all the bragging posts of “best boyfriend in the world,” “I’m the luckiest girl in the world,” “the love of my life,” and the list continues. Ugh, Gag me.
So you decide to do what some of your single friends have been doing and finally cave in and join Tinder: the one dating site which you have heard all kinds of crazy stories, good and bad. You go through all kinds of creeps and weirdos and you finally find yourself a nice one that you wouldn’t mind going out with to dinner, drinks, ice skating, coffee, and the list goes on and on.
You exchange numbers… now what? Well I am here to help you! I have gone out numerous Tinder dates and at least 85% of them have all gone very well. Here are some of the steps that I have created and follow to help guide you into the wonderful world of Tinder dating:
1. Know what you want for yourself. Do you want someone to strictly hang out with? Do you want a relationship? Do you want a friends with benefits? Do you want someone to go out and try new places with? Whatever the reason you’ve joined may be, just be sure that you know what you want for yourself and do not lose sight of that.
2. Take at least one to two weeks to get know them. This gives you enough time to get to know what they are all about and creep on them via social media with your friends to get a vibe from them.
3. Whenever you both decide on a date, make sure that it is somewhere public. I have a strict rule of meeting in the day time to mid evening. Tinder has a reputation of being strictly a hook up site, but that’s not always the case. You can do the casual dinner and movie or you can go for coffee or go see a concert or if you are of age, go out for drinks but have a two to three drink max. Nothing is worse than being absolutely hammered on a first date and him thinking that you do not know how to control your drinking.
4. For safety reasons, tell at least one to two people where you guys are meeting and what you plan on doing. It’s just nice so your friends are needed at any point in time, they know exactly where to go to and come save you. I am studying abroad in England and I use Tinder over here, and I had my friends actually follow me while I was on the date just to make sure A.) he was who he said he was and B.) nothing bad would happen to me.
5. When the day of the date comes, it’s pretty important to make sure that you guys are still on for your date. Nothing is worse than ending up waiting for a guy who does not show up. If for some reason, the day of the date comes and you just have a bad gut feeling about it, just reschedule. You can simply say, “something came up in my schedule. So can we reschedule for another day?” If he’s actually a nice guy, he’ll be more than willing to reschedule. If he gives you any kind of attitude about it, let it go, go back on tinder and keep swiping.
6. During the date it is important to remember to: BE YOURSELF AND HAVE FUN. First dates are always awkward because you guys are getting to know each other. Just relax, take a deep breath, have fun, and enjoy yourself :).
7. Now comes time for the end of the date. Do you kiss them? Do you invite them in *if you have your own place*? Do you go home with them? What?? The best advice I can say is DO NOT DO ANYTHING YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE WITH OR WILL REGRET. If you do not follow anything else I say on here, do not go home and regret doing something on this date. Remember your boundaries and your limits at all times during the date!
8. If the date went well and you guys set up another date, great! If the date went well or went poorly and you guys do not talk after, that’s fine. You are one step closer to finding the person you are meant to be with and you are realising what you do and do not want in a partner.
These aren’t the standard Tinder rules but these are just some things I have gathered over the Tinder dates I have been. I still communicate with some of them as friends and even intimately dated a few guys from Tinder. Three most important rules of my advice: Remember your boundaries, be yourself, and have fun! HAPPY SWIPING! :)