Music defines us. It makes us who we are and what believe in. Music truly is the greatest thing ever right? However, every artist in their career has a not so great album. The album just doesn’t click with their audience. It could feature everything from lackluster productions to terrible songwriting. Lea Michele anyone? (Oops!) A bad album can quickly end a career or give inspiration to work that much harder on the follow up. This year we have seen some great records from the likes of Lady Gaga and Rihanna, but that doesn’t mean they had bad ones too. Fasten your seat belts as Her Campus takes a look at the worst albums of all time. Did we mention Lea Michele’s debut album was pretty bad?
Selena Gomez & The Scene: Kiss n Tell
Today Selena Gomez is a pop megastar with mega hits like “Good For You” that captures her sex appeal and appealing voice. Yet, her debut album Kiss and Tell, didn’t fare as well. Kiss and Tell was released in 2009 and was a Kids Bop rock fest mess. Her vocals were screechy and the songs sounded like Ashlee Simpson reject. The only good song off the record was hit “Naturally.” “Naturally” was a sleek synth pop masterpiece that the rest of the album should have been. Kiss and Tell was so bad that even Entertainment Weekly gave it a D rating. Poor Selena. However the pop princess redeemed herself with a collection of pop albums to follow. Her latest record, Revival, has been named one of the “most influential” pop albums in the past 10 years. See everyone can turn garbage around.
Nicki Minaj: Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded
Everything about this album was a mess. The follow up to the commercial and critical smash Pink Friday, Roman Reloaded tried being Gaga, Lil Wayne, Britney, Kanye West and Katy Perry at the same time. The pop tracks on the record were generic (see “Automatic”) and screamed desperation for hits on pop radio. The hip-hop tracks were too aggressive while trying to live up to Pink Friday’s glory. Even hit “Starships” seems dated today and would only be played at an ice skating rink for an 8th grader’s birthday party. Can please act like this doesn’t exist? This was a 2012 disaster and only belongs in 2012. Sorry Nicki. The Pink Print was better sis. So good job with that.
Britney Spears: Britney Jean
Listen we all love Britney. She is one of the most iconic pop stars of all time and has sold 100 million albums worldwide. However, 2013’s Britney Jean didn’t live up to the hype. Britney Jean was announced with lead single “Work B**ch” and the start of her Las Vegas residency, Piece Of Me. “Work B**ch” became one of Britney’s signature classics selling more than one million digital copies and peaking at #12 on Billboard’s Hot 100. Britney Jean on the other hand was a hot mess express. The production on the album seemed dated and the songs felt like leftovers from previous albums Circus and Femme Fatale. Will.i.am produced this record and truly didn’t know what sounds fitted Britney Spears. “It Should Be Easy” and “Body Ache” shouldn’t even be on a Brooke Hogan album let alone a Britney one. YIKES. This album would make a fabulous Britney Spears tribute record but that’s about it. The album went to be Spears’ lowest seller and never saw true commercial success. But have no fear, Britney went back the studio and gave us one her best records this year, Glory.
Kevin Federline: Playing With Fire
Speaking of Britney, we now have K-Fed. Yes, Britney Spears’ ex- husband and backup dancer who decided he wanted to be a rapper. Kevin Federline released his hip-hop effort in the fall of 2006 with lead single “Lose Control.” The single failed to even chart on Billboard’s bubbling under chart and was panned as “one of the worst songs in music history”. Ouch. Playing With Fire debuted at #151 on Billboard’s Top 200 with sales of 6,000k . The album was commercially panned and was named the “worst album of all time” by many. The record was so bad that retail stores like Target only carried for its release week. The album only talked about making money off of Spears and how he was going to blow her hard earned money. There was no saving factor off this album and doesn’t even deserve the 14,000 total copies it sold. I recently saw it at Dollar Tree for 50 cents. Dollar Tree what if you pay me to buy it?
Nickelback: All The Right Reasons
I mean do we really have to explain how bad this album was? I MEAN IT’S NICKELBACK. The album was loud, annoying, and downright cringe worthy. If I never have to hear “Rockstar” again in my life I think I will be alright. This was a musical embarrassment in 2005 and is considered one of the worst “rock” albums of all time. Nothing could save it. Nothing. Today, dads who still wear Ed Hardy probably jam to it but that’s about it.
Meghan Trainor: Thank You
Actually, no thank you. This 2016 train wreck was all about Meghan and that’s about it. From the self-absorbed “Me Too” to the 90’s knock off “NO,” Thank You is probably one of the most pretentious pop albums in the history of music. The album is just one big rip off of past legends like Nsync and Christina Aguilera. She tries to live up to her debut album, Title, but fails miserable throughout. Thank You is that kind of album you purchase for your 10 year old cousin at Christmas but they return it the day after. Honestly Meghan, we get it. You are the best thing since sliced bread. *Rolls eyes*
Joe Jonas: Fastlife
Joe Jonas is one talented dude. He was the mastermind behind his band DNCE and this year’s mega smash “Cake By The Ocean.” He melted our hearts when he was rocking with Nick as The Jonas Brothers and acting in the hit TV movie Camp Rock. But there was one career move most of the public forgot and that was the release of his debut album, Fastlife. Fastlife was a misguided pop failure that tried so hard to be Justin Timberlake. It was the poor man’s FutureSex/Lovesound in all honesty. Tracks like “LoveSlayer” and “Just In Love” ripped off the sounds that made Timberlake such a household name. It was downright embarrassing. The album was all over the place, and at times, sounded rushed. A Lil Wayne featured couldn’t even get Joe a hit and the album has only sold 45,000 copies in the US. Today Joe is on top of the world with DNCE, and Fastlife is all but forgotten. Thank goodness for that.
Brooke Hogan, Undiscovered and The Redemption
Hulk Hogan’s daughter, Britney Spears wannabe, spoiled celebrity child, reality tv star. There is so many words you can use to describe Brooke Hogan. Good isn’t one of them. We listed both of her albums because they are just that bad. For the safety of your ears, never listen to these albums. 2006’s Undiscovered was a knock off Christina while 2009’s The Redemption was a knock off Britney. Not cute Brooke. However, her only hit “About Us,” is still a bop.
Vanessa Hudgens: Identified
High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens sophomore album, 2008’s Identified, was just plain awful. Lead single “Sneakernight” was horrendous and truly only belonged in a Sketchers commercial. There was not one good song off this album and the use of auto tune ruined Hudgen’s angelic voice. “Amazed” was the only redeeming factor of this record and even that was bad. Identified was one of the biggest disappointments in teen pop music history. Two years earlier, People Magazine named her debut album V as one of the greatest teen pop albums ever. Like most, People wasn’t so favorable with this album and give it one star out of four. Entertainment Weekly gave it a D-. We haven’t seen a follow up from Vanessa since.
Metallica: St. Anger
Rock legends Metallica have had their fair share of terrible albums. The worst, by far, is 2003’s St. Anger. The album is largely regarded as one of the worst records of all time by critics and rock fans alike. AllMusic even gave the album a negative review. It’s so bad people will actually make fun of you for liking it. Metallica have redeemed themselves since then.
Lea Michele: Louder
This sounds like your typical ‘tv actress trying to make it to music’ album. Well because it is. In 2014 Glee and Scream Queens star, Lea Michele, tried to break into pop music with Louder. The first single was the terrible and ear aching “Cannonball”. “Cannonball” failed to make an impact on radio and didn’t reach Billboard’s Top 40 either. Louder was released in the spring of 2014 to negative reviews. Critics even stated it sounded like a second rate Celine Dion album. The album featured lackluster power ballads and gimmicky empowerment tunes that just didn’t work. I couldn’t even make it through the album – it was that bad. It sounded like a theater kid’s demo cd trying to make it on Broadway. That’s the thing- Lea Michele ONLY belongs on Broadway. NOT POP RADIO . She has a theater trained voice which just doesn’t sound good with pop music. Lea Michele never released a follow up record and continues to act. Pop music Gods, thank you for not cursing us with another Lea Michele album, we appreciate it.
Lady Gaga: Artpop
Oh Artpop. How does one describe Artpop? Artpop IS FLAWLESS! YAAS GAGA! Unfortunately, this is not the case. Let’s be honest here, 2013’s ArtPop was an utter catastrophe. From the suckish “Applause” to her vomiting on people to promote the album, everything about ArtPop was wrong. The songs were too aggressive, lacked emotion and had no true substance. I mean “Jewels and Drugs” ? WTF! WHAT WAS THAT SONG? Everything about Artpop was tacky. There I said it. The album was a confused mess, the era wasn’t cute and the tour was all over the place. I mean she dressed as a baby half the era and sucked on a pacifier. Like what? ArtPop as a whole was one of the worst letdowns in music history. It was supposed to be the “true” follow up to 2008’s The Fame but it just fell flat. Like most bad albums, Artpop did have its great moments. From the gut wrenching “Dope” to the inspiring “Gypsy” not everything about it was terrible. But for the most part, it was dreadful. Gaga’s 2016 follow up, Joanne, was much more cohesive and put together. A true turnaround from ArtFlop.
MAKE IT STOP OUR EARS HURT. Alright music lovers, we made it through some of the worst albums of all time. We are sorry we had to put your ears through that but someone has to do it. I mean these albums just suck. However we do love every artist and bands featured! Well maybe not KFed and definitely not Nickelback. Oh well. Did you agree with these awful albums? Let us know on Twitter @HCPoinkPark !