“Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see.” Ugh. Pick-up lines have been around since the creation of flirting, and we’re all familiar with some of the classics. Whether you’re at the bar with your friends, walking down the crowded Oakland streets, or even sitting in class, odds are you have been bombarded with some of the cheesiest, funniest, or most cringe-worthy one-liners created by mankind. Here are some of the worst pick-up lines actually used on some of the Her Campus staff.
1. “‘Life without you is like a broken pencil: pointless.’ He then proceeded to take a broken pencil out of his backpack and hand it to me.”
And just like that broken pencil, this conversation is useless. Also, what am I supposed to do with this pencil now?
2. “I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you.”
Wow. You must have reached deep into the archives for that one. Have you ever heard of the phrase, “an oldie but a goodie?” Yeah, that doesn’t apply here.
3. “A few weeks ago at a Luke Bryan concert, a guy walked up to me and said, ‘Well this is uncomfortable, but did you just grab my ass?’ No sir…I did not?”
I don’t even know where he was going with that, but like, no thanks.
4. “A guy on the street passed me and said, ‘You dropped something,’ and as I looked down, he screamed, ‘My jaw!’”
Well, I suggest you pick it up and keep on moving, Buster.
5. “Ravioli! Ravioli! Give me your numberoli!“
Okay, A+ on the Spongebob reference, but like the Krabby Patty formula, my digits are a secret.
6. “‘Do you know the band Pierce the Veil? I’m the bassist.’ After I explained to him that I had seen that band the week prior.”
You have to admit, he has some guts to just go for the straight-up lie.
7. “On a scale of one to America, how free are you this weekend to Netflix and chill?”
How about a -15, but I’ll give you a 10/10 on the nope scale.
8. “Hey honey, is your body from McDonald’s? ‘Cause I’m lovin’ it”
Ba-da-ba-ba-ba I’m grossed out.
9. “In Starbucks: Hey, what’s your name? I like you a latte.”
Thanks, but I prefer a cappucci-NO.
10. “‘Did you just fart?’ I didn’t even let him finish. I sassily said, ‘I know how this ends. Bye,’ and strutted away.”
Here’s a little tip: there’s nothing romantic about farting. No matter how much someone has “blown you away.”
11. “A guy came up to me (obviously intoxicated) and got in my face and said, ‘Your face, I like that sh*t!’”
Come on, dude. You didn’t even try.
12. “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”
Okay. Wait. This one’s actually kind of adorable.