Ladies, we’ve all been there. We’ve all had that ONE guy who for some reason we just can’t stop thinking about. Whether it’s his hair, his eyes, or those uh-DOR-orable dimples – everything about him just makes us swoon. The scientific term for this, of course, is a crush. And the pulsating question behind all crush-like symptoms (including but not limited to incessant giggling and butterflies of the stomach) is always the same:
“How do I let him know I’m into him?”
Well. I decided to look at this question on the flip-side. In other words, I sought to find out what you shouldn’t do. Here is what some guys I interviewed had to say:
1. “Don’t talk about other guys in front of him thinking it will make him jealous. It’s childish, and it’ll probably drive him away.”
I think this is a mistake many of us have definitely made. It’s something that is often referred to as “playing hard to get.” The bottom line: don’t do it. Nothing says “friend-zoned” like bringing up other guys. You want to let your crush know that you’re into HIM, after all…. Right?
2. “Don’t stalk him in the cyber world… or in the real world.”
Creepy as it sounds, this one is actually kind of hard to avoid. I’ve always said most girls could be CIA agents based off the amount of dirt they can dig up on pretty much anyone. I mean with Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and other social networks, the terms “creeping” and “stalking” have become relatively commonplace. It’s hard to NOT be curious about things like, say, ex-girlfriends, for example. The thing is, though, this sort of behavior can be totally detrimental to your (potential) relationship with someone who (maybe) you hope will be more than just a crush. After all, social network rarely offer accurate representations of any person’s life. And besides, it’s better to begin a new flame without ghosts of girlfriends past…
As for real-world stalking? Just… don’t…
3. “Well you should probably not be drunk whenever you meet up with him…”
Some say alcohol is liquid courage. I think I’d classify it more along the lines of liquid regret—and this is coming from personal experience. Ladies, if you want to let a guy know you like him, let it be YOU speaking—not the alcohol.
4. “Don’t text him a lot but avoid hanging out in person.”
This was a new one for me, but I don’t find it hard to imagine that for many girls, it might be the case. While those heart emojis are definitely cute, it’s no replacement for real conversation. Instead of texting your crush “hey what’s up” (which hardly leads much further than the dreaded “nm u”), make plans to meet up for coffee. Communicate. Take the lead. Don’t be afraid to initiate a date. Often times the best approach, is the direct approach.
5. “Don’t change yourself or say that you are something you’re not just because you think he might like that.”
This one goes without saying. In fact, it’s probably the most important piece of advice anyone could ever give you. At the end of the day you just gotta be yourself.
Image credit: 1