If Pitt’s Dorms Were the Cast of Friends

By now, I hope everyone can name all six of the Friends. It’s been on Netflix since January, people! The reason Friends has such huge success is because it’s incredibly relatable—now as much as in the 90s. We all have people in our lives who remind us of certain characters. We have days we feel as put together as Monica or days we feel as scrambled as Phoebe. I’ve even started to notice the Friends on campus. Let me tell you what I mean. 

1. Rachel Green is Holland Hall

Rachel loves her girlfriends – when she’s with them, the whole show goes up an octave. Holland is of course an all-girls dorm, but Holland supports the ladies in other ways too! I’m fairly certain you can see traces of Breast Cancer Awareness month chalk outside the dorm. That was in October, but hey Holland, more power to you for supporting it all year. Not to mention she loves to be the center of attention, whether she’s bursting into a coffee shop on her wedding day or flying to London to interrupt someone else’s wedding. Likewise, Holland is right between the Union and Market, with Cathy and Hillman in view. You could really find your lobster there.

 

2. Monica Gellar is Bouquet Gardens

Monica is incredibly organized, perhaps the definition of OCD, so what dorm would be more fitting than the nicest one on campus? Everyone covets Bouquet, as the Friends covet Monica’s big apartment (we needn’t mention that 20-year-olds don’t really live like that in New York). Also, Monica loves to cook – even if she has to do it wearing roller skates and fake boobs – so she couldn’t live without a kitchen. Yes, so you can find Monica down Oakland Avenue – just don’t mention the spaghetti stain on the back of the couch cushion!

3. Phoebe Buffay is Towers

Phoebe Buffay is the eclectic friend. Phoebe is a hippy, a surrogate, a singer, a wife, a twin, a masseuse…need I go on? And needless to say, when you randomly assign nearly two thousand kids to live in Towers, the group of them is going to be quite diverse. The Towers ranges from lower class to upper class, rugby players to Quidditch players, Netflix addicts to – can we admit it?—alcohol addicts. Phoebe has no trouble encompassing that in one person. Phoebe Buffay (or is it Regina Phalange?) can be childlike, such as when Ross teaches her to ride a bike, or very grown up with the street smarts she earned after living alone in the city as a teenager. Phoebe can be sweet, as she is with her husband Mike, or a little strange when she decides to sing “Smelly Cat.” Sometimes you get a little sick of her antics, but she’s central to the unit like Towers is central to Pitt.

 

4. Ross Gellar is Sutherland West

Now this one might’ve been too easy, but Ross the paleontologist who can hardly talk about anything but dinosaurs is definitely the honors dorm, Sutherland West. Living there myself, I haven’t heard many dinosaur conversations, but frequent chatter can include debates on Russian communism and the most important number. Ross is nerdy, and he lives far away from the other Friends (did anyone say cardiac hill?), but he’s sweet and picked good friends (*nudge, nudge* Sutherland East athletes). 

5. Chandler Bing is Lothrop

Chandler always seems to draw the short end of the straw. His middle name is Muriel, his father divorced his mother for the house boy, and he has to watch his mother promote her erotic novels on television. And let’s be honest, in his relationship with Monica, he’s definitely whipped. That’s why Chandler is Lothrop. Lothrop’s location on cardiac hill should be enough, but there’s more. It’s mostly singles, it’s noisy next to the hospital, it’s kind of far from the heart of campus, and no air conditioning. Poor Chandler. Could he be unluckier? 

 

6. Joey Tribianni is the Frats

“How you doin’?” Joey’s pick-up line is a giveaway that if Joey went to Pitt, he’d rush. Joey loves picking up girls, and it’s no secret that he’s not the cleanest guy. I’m not suggesting that the frats are dirty of course but…oh wait, yes, I am. But don’t worry, you’re in good company! Everybody loves Joey because he loves to put a smile on your face, and he’s always up for a good time whether it’s at Central Perk or kicking back in his Barca-Lounger with a beer (Natty Light anyone?). 

 

Image Credit: 1, 2, 3, 4