College is a great place to meet people for potential friendships, relationships, or maybe just a single night of pleasure. Between conversation starters, dancing, buying drinks, and having drinks bought for you, it’s not always easy to keep track of the unspoken rules of social interaction. Luckily for our readers, we have member Ward McMasters and self-proclaimed party expert Nevin Sastry here to help you walk the fine line between being confident and being creepy.
Her Campus: Nevin and Ward, what would you say is the most common thing that people do that they don’t realize can be creepy?
Nevin: Definitely lingering too long. It is good to be confident when approaching someone at a bar or at a party, but it’s pretty easy to realize after a bit whether or not they want to continue the conversation. If they are giving you short answers and constantly looking away, then you should probably disengage the conversation.
Ward: Absolutely. It’s good to meet new people, but do you have to… do you have to let it linger?
HC: What are some less obvious or less noticeable things that may come off as creepy?
Ward: Buying people drinks is not always creepy, but it easily can become so. A rule of thumb is that you should know the individual in which you are buying a drink for, even if only through a short ten minutes of conversation.
Nevin: If you’re approaching a girl or guy with a drink having never spoken a word to them before, you are basically in the danger zone. It’s a bold move, so we recommend initiating a bit of conversation before extending the offer. Nobody wants to feel obliged to talk to you just because you bought them a beverage.
HC: Great advice. Do you guys have any tips on dance floor etiquette?
Nevin: If you’re not a freshman at a frat house, don’t just go up behind random girls and dance with them. You should at least know someone’s name before you put your man parts on their butt parts. You don’t want to look like a maniac on the dance floor.
Ward: I don’t think the dance floor should be the first place to meet people. Meet someone at the bar and then if you feel that the conversation is going well, ask to take it to the dance floor.
HC: What would you guys say is the single creepiest thing that people tend to do at bars or parties?
Nevin: That would definitely be following someone around at a bar. Whether or not someone wants to be in your presence should be obvious. If you’re following a girl or guy around a bar or a party trying to make sure you don’t lose track of them; you are not only being creepy but you are trying way too hard.
Ward: Yeah, don’t follow people around. That’s really creepy. Don’t follow in the words of Uncle Kracker…
HC: Yeah, that sounds very creepy. Well thank you guys again for taking time to do this interview. Do you have any last thoughts about creepiness before you go?
Ward: It sounds cliché, but just be yourself. If someone likes you then you will know if it’s genuine. All of the creepy stuff we just talked about stems from people trying way too hard to meet people, regardless of their intentions.
Nevin: And when in doubt, ask yourself this: if I saw someone else doing it, would it seem creepy? Follow all of our advice and you’ll be more socially acceptable in no time. As a parting note, post that Lonely Island video.
Photo supplied by the authors. Videos borrowed from YouTube.