Gaming is often relationship-focused in one way or another. Whether you are playing with other people in a first-person shooter like Call of Duty, racing against your parents in Mario Kart for the Wii, or talking with villagers in Animal Crossing, you are establishing a connection between yourself, other players, and the characters within the game. Gameplay can, at times, be completely dependent on your character’s dating life or friendships. The Sims 4 is a great example of this, as players have the power to make their Sims have whatever friends, family or partner they want and must maintain those relationships for their Sims. Kitty Powers Matchmaker relies on the likes and dislikes of a person to have a successful date, which can require lying about your client’s interests or personality to appear similar to their date. Suffice it to say, relationships are not absent from gaming in any capacity and are essential to an engaging experience.
Grand Theft Auto, a video game series developed by video game publisher Rockstar Games, was first released back in 1997 for PC and PlayStation, immersing players in the criminal fold of the Vercotti Crime family of Liberty City by having them run over pedestrians and avoid law enforcement. Certain countries banned the game outright due to the intense violence depicted in 640×480 pixels (note: your smartphone probably has a pixel resolution close to 2622×1206 pixels). The most recent installment in the main GTA series, Grand Theft Auto V, showcased intense, grotesque displays of physical harm as tasks within the game, such as waterboarding, kneecapping, dental extractions, and electrocution. Violence is not the only obscenity in this series. Grand Theft Auto III brought another layer of infamy, containing a feature where the player’s health can be restored by soliciting a sex worker, who can later be killed to recoup some of the player’s funds. This frames prostitution work as “beneficial” to the player while making their characterization disposable. In Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, a scrapped sex minigame entitled “Hot Coffee” was discovered by game modders, causing a full re-release of the game to bring the rating down from “AO,” or Adults Only, back to a “M,” or Mature, rating by the ESRB.
So, what is the transgression GTA VI aims to tackle? Politics? Been there. Hate crimes? Done that! As a matter of fact, it’s dating, or at least a healthy, non-transactional, consensual relationship between the two adult main characters in-game. The main gameplay mechanic? Going on dates and spending time with the other character to advance the relationship. It is an optional section of the game that unlocks story beats throughout the course of the main game, as well as extended content.
Not everyone is excited about this detail, with content creators across the Internet sparking discourse over the acceptability of their boyfriends and husbands playing GTA VI when it releases. Some are going as far as claiming that spending time with an in-game girlfriend constitutes cheating on a real-life partner. TikTok influencer Lexi Lobb argues in one of her videos, “Is GTA 6 even legal if you’re married?”, with others sprinting to her comment section to either claim her notion as insecurity or agree with her. It does beg the question—in an age where some prioritize gaming over spending time with their family, does actively participating in a romantic relationship with a program constitute cheating?
First off, as someone who has experience as a game developer, I think the likelihood that this gameplay loop offers anything a real relationship can offer is very slim. It will likely resemble Stardew Valley‘s romance model—you get items in the game to gift to the character you want to marry and talk to them every day in-game. A couple of clicks and dialogue boxes—you learn a little about the character, but the character does not really know you. In a video game, you aren’t really you in any capacity that matters. There are only a few responses the in-game girlfriend, named Lucia, by the way, will have to the dates the player takes her on, which means limited variability, and eventually, boredom. There is only so much she can provide the player with. The developers and designers are trying to tell a story with this relationship in a way that may be more respectful towards women than what they have achieved in the past. Would we rather that men play games (or play games ourselves) where women are only shown as sexual objects that can be utilized or thrown away, or would we rather see a healthier relationship depicted in media, which is all this is? I would personally say the latter.
Next, I am aware that there are some people who are in deeply romantic relationships with their AI and LLM companions and are leaving their human partners for them. That is not what this is. ChatGPT and other AI models are designed to reinforce what you are already thinking and can isolate you from reality. Games have a pre-programmed set of what they are allowed to do and where you are allowed to go. AI does not have any safeguards on its involvement or questioning when it comes to the user’s life and will remember what the user tells them. That’s the difference.
Which leads me to this point—gaming addiction is a real condition that thousands of people struggle with. If your partner is showing signs of dependence on gaming, find ways to help them combat that in a healthy way. However, if your partner starts treating you differently after they start playing GTA VI, you may want to investigate that further. It may be a sign of other flaws within your relationship. I’m not saying you need to break up, but for anyone to spend that much time with a computer program is strange. And I think most people would agree with me.