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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

So Your Ex has a New Partner…

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Pace chapter.

You broke up with your ex months ago or maybe they broke up with you and you spent two weeks binge watching rom coms and eating ice cream. Either way, you’re so over it! The petty crap is finally ending thanks to that time you got up on stage and read a poem about him to a room full of people (or that might just be me). It’s all cool, you’re fine, good riddance! Right? Right.

Yeah, no. It was all cool and then you see your ex with their brand new partner who just started following you on Instagram. That’s great, good for them, glad they’re happy! Except the breakup was bad and you’re still single. And, the little cherry on top of this whole mess, your ex brings their new partner to that one meeting that you see them at every week. It gets even more awkward when you start to play a game where someone says “step forward if” followed by a statement. So now you find yourself being asked to step forward if you compare yourself to other people… like, say how pretty your ex’s new girlfriend is compared to you. So you step forward and so does your ex’s new partner and you make eye contact with them and honestly, you’re pretty sure that someone in the room just gasped. You can’t even blame that person because the tension in the room is beyond real and the silence has dragged on for ten seconds too long.

Hopefully your situation is nowhere near as dramatic as mine, but just in case you’re struggling with the fact that your ex has a new partner, here are some tips on how to handle it:

  1. Don’t stalk your ex’s Instagram or their new partner’s. For one thing, it will definitely make you feel worse and you’re still out of ice cream from earlier. Just remember, you’re beautiful!

  2. Definitely don’t do something crazy or petty. So maybe it’s been two weeks since the breakup and your ex is parading around with this new person, it’s really okay. Let it happen and don’t go around spreading rumors or filling their backpack with eggs. Take a deep breath and remember that they’re not worth it.

  3. Do go hang out with your friends that have been texting you for a month and a half. Let your friends distract you, you could definitely use it and it’ll be beneficial for your mental health.

  4. Do some self-care! Take a bubble bath, read a book or watch your favorite movie for the eighth time this month. Just do whatever makes you happy!

  5. Don’t let them get to you. Even if your ex and their partner start making out because they saw you coming down the hall, just remember that you’re gorgeous, strong and an amazing person. You’re better than this and you can rise above the drama.

Now that you’ve got some tips on how to survive this drama mess you’ve found yourself in, you can go back to rewatching “To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before” for the tenth time and finish off that chocolate that’s hiding somewhere in your room. Just remember, you’re better than your ex! Take a deep breath, think about how amazing you are as a person and cross your fingers so you don’t get your ex or their new partner in secret Santa next week.

I'm Bethany! I'm currently a sophomore at Pace University in New York City. I'm a writer, a poet, and a great lover of books! I'm always looking to fall in love with the little things a little more every day.