When going through a traumatic event, albeit long-term or short-term, our bodies and minds store that trauma. And certain events can trigger that trauma to resurface and manifest either physically or emotionally.
Trauma responses may go unnoticed for some time as there may not be a direct connection from that trauma to the consequential behavior or action. These responses may not even appear immediately after the trauma has taken place. They can manifest for years before resurfacing in different manners. And some of these manners may be self-isolation or loathing, perfectionism, aversion to physical touch, mindfulness, maintaining boundaries, and awareness.
Now, when examining such responses, there is a distinction to be made between unhealthy and healthy responses. When dealing with an unhealthy trauma response, it’s important to not push the blame onto yourself. It can be very draining on your mental health when beginning to recognize unhealthy responses that correlate with your trauma. You may notice a switch in your behavior; as previously mentioned, you may feel more agitated, notice yourself quicken to anger, experience changes in sexual behavior such as hypersexuality or a diminished sex drive, and you may observe more obsessive tendencies driven by anxiety. Once you have recognized these slight changes in your personality and/or routine you can begin to address them and adjust to healthier responses and subsequently facilitate healthier relationships.
But the truth is there isn’t an automatic fix. The “fix” can take months or years. It’s about regulating your responses to certain triggering events and allowing yourself a moment to breathe, and making a conscious decision and effort to maintain healthy behaviors. A good way to keep unhealthy responses in check is to keep a record of what event elicited an unhealthy response and reflect on what may have been a better response. Revisiting situations in which unhealthy behaviors were demonstrated will help to shift your mindset towards exhibiting healthy behaviors first when the triggering event occurs again.