As the new year is beginning, resolutions are made, choices ring loudly, and change is invited. However, I always found my resolutions to fade, or morph, or hold little value over my personal growth and happiness. This is when I turned to love lists.
With Valentine’s Day coming up, the month of February is filled with love, partnership, appreciation, but not everyone always feels that way. February can also be the home of hurt, loss, and loneliness; unwelcome but persistent, nonetheless. Personally, I feel this way often times too, but February is one of my favorite months, and I knew it was time to embrace this winter month with love, no matter the relationship status, career, or personal obstacles ahead.
As winter in NYC is brutal all February long, I find my love lists even more vital to my happiness in the bareness of this season. I write love lists in my notes on my phone, my red leather journal with gold-tipped pages, a sticky note on my laptop screen; a constant reminder that love conquers all, no matter the coldness of the current season.
What dreams and aspirations do you have this year? What makes you happy, simply? What warms the snow in February? Or excites you in the chilly winds? That is what makes up a love list.
First off, there are many places, moods, and times where I love to write them, as I have to be in the writing mindset to feel the warmth of my list. I will give y’all my favs so you can try them out, too!
Cinnamon Sheets:
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a sunny but cold afternoon
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spice tea with a splash of almond milk
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warmed up bedsheets from the sun
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small, lined pad and no.2 pencil
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favorite TV show playing in the background
Puffy Under Eyes & Scribbles:
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black coffee at 8 A.M.
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desk light on, curtains opened
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oversized cardigan and slippers (the fuzzy ones)
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the leather journal, unlined, messy
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classical music through headphones
Refrigerator Light Dancing:
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2 A.M. in the kitchen
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Sticky notes all over the fridge
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Cake, lots of it
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PJs and hair up in a bun
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Loud music (breakup songs from Taylor Swift, preferably)
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Fridge open as the source of light
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Twirl around and write everything you love down
Once you have the perfect place to write your love list, get your best ballpoint pen and be messy with it. All of my lists are almost unreadable, scribbled outlines with terrible cursive. The fast, messy writing allows for your thoughts to flow so fast; you don’t have time to overthink, wonder, and question (you can do that later). Just write what you love, as simple as that.
A love list envelops everything you love, want to love… creating a space for what makes you. YOU come alive through the things, people, and places you admire. I’ve found that love lists work better for me than resolutions because the pressure dissolves, and your simplest desires pour out.
So, this February, amidst the pain and hurt you might feel, embrace your solidarity, your obstacles, your struggles and write about what you love. February will start to feel less like the depth of winter and more like the cheesy sweetness of a rose-petalled room.
Happy love month!!!!