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Dealing with Your Best Friends Living on Different Corners of the Country

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Oxford Emory chapter.

Everyone has a best friend or someone that they are closer to than anyone else. They are your go-to-person to ask to a concert that is coming up, the one you get ready with before the big high school prom, the one you laugh with at stupid youtube videos when it is three in the morning. They are your person, your best friend, sometimes even, your other half. Heck, you may even have multiple best friends! You are inseparable; there is never one without the other. What happens when you move for college and go to different states that are on opposite sides of the country, though?

My best friends and I all had different career paths. I am pre-med, one wants to be a screenwriter and work in film, one has decided to go into the military, another wants to be a music journalist, and another is going to sewing school in order to become a costume designer. It was no surprise that we all had different colleges in mind when the application process began. In the end, we all ended up deciding on colleges that were hundreds of miles apart. In the moment, this did not seem like that big of a deal; it didn’t really hit us, I guess. It didn’t hit until a week or two after starting school. When you see someone every day for almost ten years of your life, they become a constant, and you almost can’t imagine them not being there. When school starts up and you can’t just turn to one of your best friends and make a dumb joke or text them to come over and there’ll be there in twenty minutes, it starts to mess with you. The inside jokes obviously don’t work anymore, you can’t have a whole conversation with them just through facial expressions, and you can’t stay up having a Netflix marathon and laughing like idiots. For me, at least, I didn’t realize that I’d miss these little things so much until they stopped happening. This was one of the hardest things I had to deal with once I moved for college.

However, nothing stops best friends from being best friends. True love and companionship like that doesn’t just break because of some pesky distance in miles! Luckily, for our generation, technology is super advanced. We have texting, facetime, and even the ability to video-chat with multiple people at once. Obviously, these gadgets are perfect for keeping up with your best friends and making sure you can communicate every day. What helped us is that we made sure to set aside time each week where we all would catch up and stay updated on each other’s lives. We also have a huge group text where we randomly send stuff that remind us of each other, and it feels like we’re almost together making stupid jokes again. These moments keep me sane, and I’m happy that I can say weird stuff again without having to explain them. What will be even better is seeing them in person for the first time again during Thanksgiving break and being able to tell them wild college stories in person! Yeah, the distance thing sucks, but knowing that you have those moments to look forward to and that you have so much to talk about and experiences to share makes it all worthwhile. It’s also helpful to know that you’re not the only one going through this and that others are also struggling; you’re not alone! 

Old friends are amazing, but making new ones is a great thing, too! Oxford has so many events and activities during those first few weeks of orientation, and even throughout the rest of the school year, that it is almost impossible to not make a friend. You all chose this school for a reason, and you all were chosen by this school for a reason, so you’re more than likely bound to have something in common with somebody. I’ve met some incredible people and learned so much just from my PAL group in orientation alone, and I’ve learned even more from the friends I’ve made in class. You’re not “betraying” or “forgetting” your old friends by making new ones; now, you have more stories to share with each other and are expanding your list of loved ones! I talk about my old best friends with my college friends all the time and vice versa. It may have only been a few months and first semester is still going on, but I can tell that I’ve made some true, good friends already, and I can’t wait to start referring to them as my best friends, too.

Being far from your best friends isn’t any fun at all, but the experiences you’ll gain and the new friends you’ll make along the way make it all worthwhile. You’ll have even more stories to share, and those moments when you’re all back together will feel even more amazing. The distance won’t seem as daunting over time, and the communication each week will help to ease this. You’ll learn so much from the new friends you’ll make, and you’ll grow even more as a person. Oxford College is diverse, and there are so many people to meet and create new experiences with! You’re never alone here, and that’s something I am, and we all should be, absolutely thankful for.

All Photos from Pexels (Image 1, Image 2, Image 3)

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Jordan Chapman

Oxford Emory

Jordan Chapman is a visual art and international studies major with a French minor at Emory University. As a second year student, she's incredibly busy, but when you add jetsetting and writing a blog (in addition to a Youtube channel), her life is more busy than you may think. When she isn't watching Stranger Things or writing blog posts, she's in class or sending emails, with the dream of being the next big editor or fashion blogger. As a future London expat and wanderlust victim, she visits the land across the pond quite frequently along with many other places in Europe frequently, just hoping that life will take her somewhere fun and exciting.