Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
Life

Tips for Keeping Old Friends Close in College

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Oswego chapter.

Whether you’re in college missing your high school besties or out in the real world missing your friends from college, it can be difficult to show some love when life drags you in a million different directions. Staying close with friends can be a challenge, no matter how tight your bond or how hard you try to set time aside. However, there are a few things you can do to ensure that your friendships don’t disintegrate when life gets real:

 

Plan a yearly girls trip: Now, this doesn’t have to be anything huge — maybe it’s just going to someone’s lakehouse for a few days or taking turns going to each other’s hometowns or favorite vacation spots. Schedule them the same weekend every year or plan months in advance so everyone can get off work and no one’s surprised when the date arrives. This will also help keep you guys close because you’ll always be looking forward to the trip, and planning requires a decent amount of communication.

Continue to do things you always have: My hometown best friends and I watched The Bachelor together every week for almost five years. So now that we’re all in different college towns, we talk in a group chat throughout the viewing and occasionally group Facetime. Keeping traditions that you have, even if you have to alter them a bit to fit everyone’s lifestyle, will definitely strengthen your bond by proving how much you value one another. Never forget about the things you loved to do together most. Continuing even the smallest traditions will keep you young and will ensure that at least one aspect of your relationship will stay the same forever.

Similarly, be sure to keep your besties in the loop: If there are certain things you always talk to them about, continue to do so. The interaction itself may be different but that topic is part of what makes your relationship unique. Trust me, they are never too busy to help you through something nor celebrate a long-awaited success. It might hurt them to find out that you stopped updating them on something you two always bonded over.

Make it a point to meet each other’s new friends: First of all, visiting friends in college is always a blast, but there comes a certain high from having your old and new besties all in one place, especially if they click! It’s like your two worlds colliding in the best way. Moreover, if everyone knows everyone it makes it easier to tie them into your current life. It forces you to grow together and creates just a little more common ground between the two of you when it feels as though you’re drifting apart. Actually getting acquainted with each other’s friends will make the crazy stories even funnier and more relatable. It will no longer feel like you’re living in some parallel universe without your best friend; they’ll finally get to be a part of it!

 

Understand that things are simply different now, and never forget that you’re friends with these people for a reason.  Don’t take it too personally if they take too long to get back to you or even go days without speaking. If you’re thinking of them or missing them, tell them! You should never feel annoying for reaching out to someone you confided in for so long.  It can be easy to get jealous when you see your best friend making new best friends, so don’t forget to work on your bond and reassure one another of the value you place within each other.

 

Kailey is a Senior who double-majors in English and Adolescent Education. She has been a writer from the time she could hold a pencil and an aspiring teacher since 1st grade. She currently substitute teaches at a preschool and hopes to teach ELA and Creative Writing to high schoolers in the future. Kailey is an fervent reader, runner, and yogi who is happiest when laughing with loved ones or eating something full of sugar!
Melissa Lee

Oswego '19

CC Melissa is a senior journalism major with a double minor in creative writing and political science at SUNY Oswego. She loves music, makeup, dogs, and napping. 95% of the time she can be found drinking way too much coffee or finding new music on Spotify.