Lately, I’ve been having the feeling that I’m not doing good enough. I find myself wishing there were just a few more hours in the day, every day. Just so that I could begin to feel as though I’ve spent an adequate amount of time working on my schoolwork and doing course readings, being involved on campus, creative writing, finding time to eat and remembering that humans need water to survive. Even though some days I feel like the work just keeps piling up and I keep completing it as it goes, I still feel like I could do more. I feel like I could put in more time perfecting everything instead of just doing it. I feel like getting my work done and getting a good grade isn’t good enough. I feel as though I should be receiving great grades. I feel as though I am wasting my potential just getting by. Hearing that I’m doing good work, great work, from friends, family, even my professors and I still can’t find a way to feel as though I’m doing anything adequately. like I’m stuck on autopilot, just barely making it by as the days pass. Like the real me is waiting to shine through and overcome everything I’m dealing with school, life, and more life. When will I be able to not only just get by, but to excel? Is that day today? Is the day I excel the day I finally put my foot down and force myself to tap into all of my unused potential? Or am I purely just too hard on myself? Am I setting myself to an unrealistically high expectation or am I truly better than what I am presenting as? The funny thing is, usually there’s an answer to my questions. I ask these questions within my writing, to clue people into what I’m about to say next. Context clues, but I don’t even know the answer this week. Usually, there’s a hidden meaning behind what I write, but for this week there really is no hidden meaning except that I’m exhausted. If you resonate with anything that I’ve said here, I wish you the best of luck in discovering that you’re truly doing enough. I think we should be easier on ourselves, but I don’t seem to take my own advice.
The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Oswego chapter.