The hair on my head is my crown and a representation of a journey I made to reclaim my identity. Growing up in an African American household, I did not have a choice on the state of my hair and what hairstyles I wanted to wear. In order to make things “easier,” my mother turned to perming or relaxing my hair. For as long as I could remember, my hair was either in small box braids, two twists, or cornrows. Although my hair was in protective styles majority of the time, I could never recall my hair being in any other state than straight.
Upon entering middle school, my mother and I began going to the hair salon to get wash & sets. Wash & sets consisted of getting my hair washed, sitting under a hair dryer in rollers, and then blow dried. While writing this article, I reminisce and can almost feel the heat, burning my scalp again in hopes to get my hair as straight as it can be. Going to the hair salon throughout middle school and in the beginning of high school became a routine. My mother would always remind me to go every two weeks after school. In between the salon visits I would always wear my hair in a ponytail because my hair would sometimes become puffy and I would be “sweating out” the perm.
When looking at others, one of the first things that you notice is someone’s hair. Being around my younger cousins and seeing how long their natural hair was always made me wonder what if I was natural. I would often jokingly tell my mother that my hair would’ve been that long if she would’ve never permed it. In response my mother would brush it off and pay me no attention.
As I got older, my hair became my responsibility and I was accustomed to getting a relaxer every month paired with my hair salon visits. But in my sophomore year, I finally got the courage and I told myself I wanted to see how my hair was in its natural state. Before starting my natural hair journey, I had to make the decision of cutting off all my relaxed hair or transitioning. For me the choice was easy because I didn’t want to go from having a decent amount of hair, to none at all. Therefore, I made the choice to transition from relaxed hair to natural hair.
The transition from relaxed hair to natural hair was a pretty rough time. This transition consisted of me growing my hair out and not relaxing the new growth. Allowing my hair to grow without any manipulation made me see the new appearance of curls. Dealing with two textures was extra rough on wash days because I had to detangle straight damaged hair combined with new curls. Throughout this time I turned to my go-to hairstyle of ponytails and buns. Within two months you could see the difference in my bun because my hair was thick at the roots but then straight at the ends. My transitioning process lasted around seven months to a year until I made the big chop.
On September 2, 2017, I went to the hair salon and did the big chop. Cutting my hair off provided me with a new beginning and I could finally embrace the hair that naturally formed on my head. Since I had grown out my hair quite a bit, I had a small afro and I was excited for my new start. But, following my visit I had quite a hard time styling my hair because my curls were not fully developed yet. Also, I was not sure how to create the same style that the hair dresser did on my first day natural. Throughout my journey, the biggest tool was YouTube because of the many hair tutorials and hair influencers. By watching YouTube videos I was able to learn about detangling techniques, hairstyles, products, and more. Overall, I am glad that I took control of my hair because it comes with versatility and it represents me. Every curl represents strength and the hard work it has taken me to maintain the length and pattern of my hair. As someone who was hesitant, I’m here to tell you if you’re thinking about doing that big chop or going natural it is a hard journey but all worth it!