I have been with my boyfriend now for around four months. We’ve grown really close but will both be heading home–9 hours away from each other–in a few short weeks. We haven’t had “the talk” about whether we plan to stay together over the summer. I don’t want to bring it up and ruin the last fun few weeks of spring term, but I also want to know where we stand and make a plan for what comes next. We’ll both be back in the fall for our last year and I hope we can spend it together.
Long Distance Dilemma
Dear Long Distance Dilemma,
Long distance relationships are typically a topic couples tend to look away from, but I believe a little distance can help build a relationship stronger than ever. It seems you’ve grown close to your boyfriend, enjoy his company and are looking to the future. With summer just around the corner and nine hours of travel separating you two, having the talk may be a good idea. Over the course of your 4 months relationship you’ve been exclusive with this one guy and if a little distance scares him maybe he’s not the one, but before jumping to any conclusions you should sit down with him face to face and talk it out.
Create you own relationship standards.
A long distance relationship may seem like a recipe for disaster, but talking it out before hand will help both sides while apart. Being distant from your boyfriend may bring out the worst in you, but being positive and trusting is crucial. A positive attitude will keep your relationship fresh and keeps you looking forward to that next encounter, avoid jealously at all costs. Being apart enables you to share each others distant experiences and makes conversations that much more exciting. Also, being apart doesn’t mean you cannot conquer new things together. This will be a challenge for both of you but you can set goals for each other and try to accomplish them. While you are physically apart, you have the chance to grow emotionally closer.
Young, Wild, and Free
I completely understand how you feel about that special someone and over the last four months you’ve probably built a strong relationship. Keep in mind you are young and living the greatest times of your life. If your boyfriend doesn’t want to have this talk or seems skeptical about being apart, maybe he’s not the one. If you try to think in a larger scope, a four month isn’t a long time, summer itself is about that long. If he cannot stay exclusive for the short summer months he doesn’t deserve you and you deserve better.